Boyfriend: This song was in ‘Beavis and Butt-head do America’!
Girlfriend: Yeah?
Boyfriend: I love that movie … And I love you.
–Dunkin Donuts, 26th & 7th
Overheard by: Kai Nagai-Rothe
Boyfriend: This song was in ‘Beavis and Butt-head do America’!
Girlfriend: Yeah?
Boyfriend: I love that movie … And I love you.
–Dunkin Donuts, 26th & 7th
Overheard by: Kai Nagai-Rothe
Girl: The last guy she slept with was eleven inches.
Guy: Well, she is from Queens.
–N train
Girl #1: So I told her she should totally come to the beach on Saturday, and you know what she said? She said she can't… she has her “lady friend.” And I was like “hello, tampon.”
Girl #2: I'm so over those.
Girl #1: That's what she said too.
Girl #2: Word!
–Bathroom, Central Park Playground
Overheard by: Heather
Woman: I’ll give you one up the butt if you let me be a stay at home mom.
Man: Once for every year you stay home.
Woman: Once per child.
Man: Once for every two years, or I’ll be the stay at home.
Woman: Fine.
–Astor Place
Teen girl: You know, relationships are a lot like the British government. The queen thinks she’s in charge, but the prime minister has all the power.
Teen boy: I wonder if people in the real world are subjected to this kind of conversation.
–Stuyvesant High School, Chambers Street
(about the Sex and the City movie)
Woman #1 : Yeah, I never saw the series but I think I'll still understand the movie.
Woman #2: Oh, yeah. I watched the whole series 'til the end.
Woman #1: Which one's Carrie?
Woman #2: Sarah Parker is Carrie. Yeah, and she was with this guy for a loooooong time. A loooong long time.
Woman #1: Yeah?
Woman #2: Yeah, they call him “Mista bits.”
Woman #1: What do they call him?
Woman #2: Mista bits.
–Downtown E Train
Overheard by: E
Drunk girl: I'm totally into “Wham, bam, thank you mam.” People think it's trashy but I just wanna get mine.
Less drunk girl: I like to have relationships, make them work for it. I mean, what do you get out of a one-night-stand?
Drunk girl: One time I stole the guy's watch.
–LIRR
Chick on cell: The well of his fuckwaddery springs eternal.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Wild Dog Boy
Columbia student: Fuck. Fucking titties! What the fuck? Fucking titties, this is some goddamn bullshit! I really want a snack.
–110th & Broadway
Guy to girl: Are you serious? I'm not fucking creepy, okay? I'm not fucking creepy.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: NYU girl
Man on bicycle, yelling at car: Fuck you! Yeah, use your fucking blinkers, you fuckstick!
–10th & Broadway
Overheard by: Helene and Alice
Guy on cell, in monotone with no pauses: Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, I need you, I need you, I need you, bitch. (hangs up)
–M4 Bus
Woman shopper to husband: Where's your spirit?
Husband: My spirit is broken.
Woman shopper : So you're saying I broke your spirit?
Husband to another lady shopping: It's okay, you can high-five her!
–Macy's
Little boy: I love Manhattan! I love Tic-Tacs!
–Brooklyn Heights
Wife to husband: No wonder your eyebrows are making love!
–47th & 5th
Overheard by: anon
Biotech to texting friend: Now we’ll see how much he cares about you. I love testing people!
–23rd Ave, Astoria
Overheard by: sara n.
Gleeful hobo rubbing stubble beard: I love my beard! Mmmm, I love you.
–93rd & Broadway
Overheard by: punkee
Queer on cell: I don’t want love handles on love day!
–Lafayette & Astor
Woman on cell: Happy Valentine’s Day… Do you still love me, or do you hate me now?
–Hudson St
Overheard by: lilli
