Female suit to thug trying to push through to the front: You know, there's really nowhere for you to fit in here.
Thug: Don't mess with me, I'm from The Bronx.
Female suit: Don't mess with me. I'm from Jersey.
–1 Train
Female suit to thug trying to push through to the front: You know, there's really nowhere for you to fit in here.
Thug: Don't mess with me, I'm from The Bronx.
Female suit: Don't mess with me. I'm from Jersey.
–1 Train
Suit: (bangs on information glass repeatedly)
Clerk, playing with his iPod: How may I help you?
Suit: Can I exchange my expired MetroCard?
Clerk: See the sign says “information only”? Go across the street.
Suit: So what are you here for? To play with your iPod?
Clerk: I deserve my job.
–R Train
Overheard by: Danchik
Giggling guy in suit: The seven is like way out there. I mean, way out there. I hear people just take out woks and start cooking in them. Like it’s Chinatown or something.
–Q train
Overheard by: Adrian
Law professor: Sometimes you just want to tell your client, "Wake the fuck up!"
–NYU Law School
Law student on cell: Well, it's hard to locate them, since I don't know who they are.
–Columbia Law School
Overheard by: arctinus
Older looking woman on cell: No, don't fight him, Henry. We're Jewish. God gave us lawyers for a reason.
–42nd & Avenue of the Americas
Overheard by: Elizabeth
Awesome judge: If you do not have a basic understanding of the English language, you will not be able to serve. If you cannot understand what I'm saying, please come up now. Now, two translators will translate what I just said. If you understood what I said, obviously don't come up here.
–Supreme Court Building
Suit to girl: You must be a lawyer. (pause) Or a cunt.
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: How did he know?
Thug: Don't say anything to her! Don't you know anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law?
–132nd & St. Nicholas
Drunk lawyer on phone: Yeah! I convict rape victims.
–Outside Shea Stadium
Hobo: Can you spare a cigarette? I know you have one. My friend was a commodities trader, and he taught me all about Wall Street. You must love those expensive cigars! [laughs]Suit: That’s amazing. Where’s your friend now?
Hobo: I don’t know. He’s homeless.
–Wall St
Overheard by: steven lowell
Megaphone lady: Don’t buy from Canada! Don’t go to Canada! Don’t support Canada at all!…Don’t buy Canadian beer!
–49th & 6th
Suit #1: Do you want a drink?
Suit #2: It's 7 o'clock in the morning.
Suit #1: And…?
–E 44th & Lex
Overheard by: Cran
Suit: Did they tip their 45s to their homies?
–Park Avenue
Overheard by: SuperVixen
Suit on phone: 500 milligrams? That's nothing. First, you need to start looking at the definition of possession…
–Broadway & Reade
Suit to little son: I need to teach you the difference between "homos" and "hobos." You'll understand easily, (giggles) …not much of a difference.
–Doctor's Office, Carrol Gardens
Suit on phone, snickering: Your posts are turd sandwiches!
–4th Ave & 13th St
Overheard by: ris
Suit on cell: I say go for it. You're rich, she's hungry. What could be more perfect?
–47th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Adrienne
Suit: I’ve got good news and bad news. The good news is, I’m not divorced. The bad news is, if I go to Benihana’s on Friday I will be.
–Midtown office
Gay suit #1: So did you hear that he got a new apartment?
Gay suit #2: No!
Gay suit #1: I'd say it's the house that porn built.
–Chelsea
