16-year old girl #1: I want to find out more about gay genocide.
16-year old girl #2: Huh?
16-year old girl #1: You know, what the Jews wear… And baby Hitler.
–96th St & Broadway
Overheard by: feygele
16-year old girl #1: I want to find out more about gay genocide.
16-year old girl #2: Huh?
16-year old girl #1: You know, what the Jews wear… And baby Hitler.
–96th St & Broadway
Overheard by: feygele
Woman: A hundred dollars worth of squeaky toys and you eat garbage off the floor! I don’t get it.
–22nd & 7th
Overheard by: debo
Teenage boy: Once I hit the blind kid that lives downstairs with a ball and I felt so bad but it had me thinking, “what if he got his sight back by me hitting him?”. I would be like, “yo, you have your sight back thanks to me, give me some money.”
–2 train
Girl on cell: Your ass is, like, slightly cuter than my face.
–Union Square
Pompous, insane English professor: Right now I am being plagued by a contagion, but I will return your reports anon.
–Barnard College
Student, to friend who just bashed the side of his head: What the hell? You're hurting my ganglia!
–Columbia University
Overheard by: John David
Black mom to teen daughter walking away from her: No, you get back here and listen to what I'm sayin! You gotta pay attention–niggas be instigatin!
–Nassau & Fulton
Overheard by: Tigertail
First year legal scholar: I feel like our relationship is terminated for perpetuity.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: bunbury
Yuppie on phone: Wait. (pause) Bruhaha, right?
–70th & Broadway
Long Island teenage girl #1: Yesterday the train was so much more crowded. You couldn't find a seat.
Long Island teenage girl #2: I found a seat yesterday.
Long Island teenage girl #1: Ugh! I don't want to sit next to creepy guys (pause) that make fun of us.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Non-creepy guy, that makes fun of them
Teenage Guy: Hahaha, I just put my sac on your arm!
Teenage Girl: What the fuck do you think gives you the right to do that?
Teenage Guy: Well, we’re dating, aren’t we?
–Central Park
Overheard by: Snow White
Teen guy rehearsing: I can’t concentrate on my scene right now.
Teen girl: Oh… I think I know why. Is it because of last night?
Teen guy: Yeah! I can’t believe Delishis won Flavor of Love — it’s been depressing me all day!
–Friends Seminary
Guy: Thanks, ma’am.
Teenage cashier: Did he just call me “ma’am?”? Do I look like a ma’am? I don’t look that old, do I?
Guy: No, no; “ma’am” is a sign of respect, not age.
Teenage cashier: Okay, then.
Guy: Uh, thanks, hot mama.
Teenage cashier: Did he just call me “hot mama”?
–Gourmet Garage, Broadway
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Teen girl #1: Lauren! What is the name of the movie I saw that one time? You know — there was a guy in it. He had, um… hair? He was sad and stuff?
Lauren: Johnny Depp in Edward Scissorhands.
Teen girl #1: Yes! Exactly! Him! He was in another movie. I swear… Um… His hair was different, though, and he had that hat. We should rent that movie.
Lauren: The movie Secret Window will scare you. Your mind can’t take in something like that.
Teen girl #1: Hey! Well, yeah, maybe you’re right.
Teen girl #2, to Lauren: How can you ever tell what she’s talking about?!
Lauren: I can read the minds of idiots. It’s a sad and useless power. Except, of course, in cases like this.
–Central Park
Hipster guy to hipster chick: …and he's like, "I didn't come; why is there so much come all over?" And she's like, "Oh, you're number 23." So he's like, "Oh, okay." And he starts pounding away again!
–Bedford & 11th, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Kaitlen
Woman, with her mouth about an inch from a guy, about to kiss him: I can't, I already had sex with three guys today.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Derek
Girl to friend: I'm really worried about her. I think she has a serious case of slutism.
–66th & Columbus
Preppy girl on cell: Yeah, so apparently "Happy hour Tuesday" equals "Walk of shame Wednesday." I just wish I could've been working at my job for more than a week before I walked in reeking of shame and spermicide. (pause) Actually, I wish the spermicide thing was true. Then I wouldn't have to drop $50 bucks today on plan B.
–Wall St
Teenage boy on cell: She's still sleeping with my brother. I mean, my brother is sleeping with like ten other girls…but she's in his regular rotation.
–Starbucks, Montague Street
NYU student on cell: But logic doesn't call you back. Logic sleeps with you and leaves in the morning.
–Kimmel Center
