Sales rep: I'm sorry, ma'am, we don't have that specific style here. You could try Saks.
Affluent German woman: The lady at Saks told me to look here! (sniffling) Why does everyone lie to me?
–Bergdorf Goodman, 5th Ave
Overheard by: Blacknoise
Sales rep: I'm sorry, ma'am, we don't have that specific style here. You could try Saks.
Affluent German woman: The lady at Saks told me to look here! (sniffling) Why does everyone lie to me?
–Bergdorf Goodman, 5th Ave
Overheard by: Blacknoise
Blockbuster employee, reading newspaper: I've never heard of these airlines. Qatar?
Customer: It's a country.
–Blockbuster Store
Four-year old to his father, dreamily: Let's go on the u train! The beautiful u train!
–D Line
Overheard by: Caitlin
Ditzy girl to friend: I hope there's an exit at this station.
–96th St Station
Amiable suit, answering cell: Hi, hon. (pause) Well, I can't talk long–I have to drive this train.
–Amtrak, Penn Station
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Little boy: Is this train going to move, or what?
–Transit Museum
Overheard by: Rita
MTA worker in booth, over intercom: Hello everyone. The cost to ride the subway is $2. Only $2. The woman in that blue leather jacket and red hat thinks it's free. If you are standing next to a woman in a blue leather jacket and a red hat, tell her she needs to pay her toll like everyone else.
–6 Train Station
Young woman, entering restroom, to Starbucks employee standing outside: Oh, I thought you were waiting to use it.
Starbucks employee: No. I'm the bathroom genie. I make the magic happen.
–Starbucks
CVS employee: So, did you go to the gay pride parade?
Flamboyantly gay Latino man: You know, I never goes to those things, I just can't stand all the faggots.
CVS employee, with blank stare: Have a good night.
–CVS
Overheard by: wyatt
Lady to mobile salesman: I know you went to the back to speak to the manager, don't lie to me.
Salesman: Actually, I went to the back to take a shit.
Lady: I hope you don't shit for a week.
–Brighton Beach, Brooklyn
Overheard by: nikki
Headline by: Jonny-G
Runners-Up:
· “First Rule Of Sales: The Customer Is Your Friend, Not Your Enema” – Vasyl
· “Great! How Am I Supposed to Overshare with Customers Now?” – beans
· “He’s Glad He Didn’t Tell the Truth That He Had Sex Back There” – Deborah
· “I’ll Save It Up, Just for You” – Keith
· “The Ancient New York Curse” – Natalie
· “The Gypsies Were Getting Lazy with Their Curses” – my other comment is witty
Boss: Genocide is funny.
Intern: Genocide is not funny. Aids is funny.
–59th & Madison
Suit: It's at the point now it doesn't matter too much if my wife gets mad, it's the nanny I can't upset. (other men laugh and agree)
–Uptown A Train
Female employee: I do not want to go to anger management for a third time.
–115th & 5th
Overheard by: Tara
Girl to guy: You seem like the kind of person that would be mad if they got shot.
–Wildwood, Park Ave & 18th St
Overheard by: Sean
Mom to three-year-old son: You mad? You mad? Well, you know what "mad" is spelled backwards, right? "D-a-m." Ain't nothin' you can do about that.
–St. Nicholas Ave & 127th St
Overheard by: stella ho
Thug: She's just mad 'cause she's Mexican.
–Staten Island Mall
Overheard by: Wendla B.
Hostess running out of restaurant: Angry couple who just left the bar! You forgot your credit card!
–The Village
Overheard by: DW
Birthday girl: It's my birthday today!
Sales rep: Oh yeah? It's my brother-in-law's birthday today, too.
Birthday girl: Well, he must be totally awesome!
Sales rep: Yeah, he's in rehab for drugs.
–26th & Madison
Older worn-out assistant: Do you know how hard it is to find an on-call tranny hooker?
Suit: On-call?
–51st St & Park Ave
Overheard by: krissy
