Man whore on cell: So for Christmas, I'm going to that strip club I met Susan at…just to do something special, ya know.
Religious woman: Because nothing says “I love my savior” like topless sluts and lap dances.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Jasper
Man whore on cell: So for Christmas, I'm going to that strip club I met Susan at…just to do something special, ya know.
Religious woman: Because nothing says “I love my savior” like topless sluts and lap dances.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Jasper
Black guy: Wanna see what I'm famous for?
Tourist: No, I don't want to see your penis.
–Central Park Entrance
Gay guy #1: Madonna's a bitch. She never returns my calls.
Gay guy #2: Wow, what a bitch.
–Central Park
Preppy gay guy #1: They are so nasty and full of diseases.
Preppy gay guy #2: What, the pigeons?
Preppy gay guy #1: No, the children.
–Central Park
Girl, scratching her arm: I have a bug bite; it itches.
Guy: You think that's bad? I have a genital wart.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Fox
Hobo to teenage girls filling up water balloons in water fountain: You're having a water balloon fight?
Teenage girl: Yeah. We have to be careful, though, they might attack us from behind.
Hobo: That's what Michael Jackson does. (walks away, leaves teenage girls in bewilderment)
–Central Park
Overheard by: Emma
Upper East Side queer teen: Oh my gosh, you have such a cool accent! Where are you from? Like England or something?
Black girl: Brooklyn.
–Central Park
Overheard by: TM
20-something guy on cell: In the eight-minute cab ride it went from her telling him he was wearing a cheap coat to her licking his face!
–Sheep Meadow, Central Park
Overheard by: Robert
Conductor: We are not moving because of a switch problem at 125th. If you are in a hurry, there are taxis upstairs.
–Uptown D Train
Overheard by: Wes
30-something man in Santa suit on cell: Where the fuck is my fucking taxi, bitch?
–Lafayette & Spring
Cop pulling over a cabbie: Why did you honk? Where did you see danger? Where did you see danger? Besides behind your own wheel…
–Times Square
Woman cut off by cab while crossing the street: Oh my god! I'm getting cab-fucked left and right!
–Broadway & Spring
Overheard by: Marc
Screaming child: I want ice cream and I want it now! Now! Now! Mom, get me ice cream!
Mother, calmly: Darling. While I love you deeply, I would really like to shove your behavior in the middle of the street to be run over by a bus. Understand?
–Central Park
Overheard by: queenofscots
Woman: In Central Park right now, the Mormons are in full bloom!
–Bandshell, Central Park
Overheard by: Mojosaves
Chick to boyfriend: I could really use some Viagra, maybe I can get some from my grandpa. (pause) Wait, never mind, he's Mormon.
–17th St & 5th Ave
Girl: What do the Mormons have against gay people? Is it because the gays dress better? I mean, Mormons only like to wear white shirts and black pants.
–Uptown A Train
Deliriously drunk woman: I was Mormon!
–Times Square
