Random guy to two girls: Hey, are you from NYU?
Girl: Yeah.
Random guy: Murderers!
–3rd Ave & 11th St
Random guy to two girls: Hey, are you from NYU?
Girl: Yeah.
Random guy: Murderers!
–3rd Ave & 11th St
Teenage black girl to white guy and black girlfriend: Take her to Red Lobster! Red Lobster is the best. It's like an expensive date restaurant.
50-something black guy, interrupting: Red Lobster? Are you fucking serious? Red Lobster is fast food!
Teenage girl, after rethinking: Well… There's a Denny's in Brooklyn.
–LIRR
20-something suit on phone: Yeah, man. Just come over. We can spoon and talk about chicks and shit.
–Wall & Pearl
Overheard by: traceface
Thug to another: Those bitches be cuddlin' your wounds!
–42nd St
Hispanic woman on phone: Yeah, it's crazy snowin' outside. (pause) Uh-huh, yeah, you wanna cuddle. (pause) Hahaha, uh-oh! (pause) Uh-oh, spaghetti-o! (pause) Haha, no, you've already done that. (pause) Hahaha… You've done that already. I have to spin the other way now.. (pause) He he he, you're crazy. Hee heee. (pause) Well, you have a lovely day inside a warm place!
–Q Train
Overheard by: Em Allears
Crazy lady to herself: Does anyone wanna snuggle me for the hell of it? (five minutes later) Why are all these people here? Is it a workday? Cuz if it is, I'm going to get fired. I need a beer!
–G Train
Overheard by: LaughedOutLoud
Guy at cafe: I have pillows just for spooning.
–6th St & 2nd Ave
Guy: Guess what? We had sex.
Girl: (gasp)
–8th St & University Pl
Overheard by: JBeck
Girl #1: That looks like your wedding band.
Guy: Yeah, it could be mine.
Girl #2: What?
Guy: Two months after we got married, I threw my wedding band into the ocean.
–Brooklyn Flea Market
Overheard by: Ferris
Guy #1: Yeah, we lived together for a couple of months.
Guy #2: Where at?
Guy #1: Rikers.
–F Train
Guidette: This weekend I'm going on a fat diet.
Disinterested guy: True.
Guidette: Suzanne Somers did it…I can't believe it worked.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Shaggy
Girl: You know how, like, Chris* lives in the Bronx?
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: And you know how like there are drive-bys there all the time, right?
Guy: (gives her a skeptical look)
Girl: Well, Chris* was going home late the other night and there was a drive-by! He says he saw blood and everything! Can you believe that? Blood! Ewwwwww!
Guy: If you witnessed a drive-by shooting your first reaction would be, “ewwwwww!”? Mine would be “I gotta get out of here before I get shot!”
Girl: Anyway, it just proves my point about the Bronx.
–6 Train
Young girl: Are you Jewish?
Thirty-something guy in suit: No. Are you?
Young girl: No.
Thirty-something guy in suit: Why? Is that a prerequisite for a one night stand?
Young girl: Am I seriously hearing this?
–Blind Pig, 14th St
Overheard by: Seventh Floor Walk-up
