Dad: We're going over there. To the mall.
Six-year-old son: I need some shit. And who's going to buy me some shit? You.
–33rd & 6th
Overheard by: EthanK
Dad: We're going over there. To the mall.
Six-year-old son: I need some shit. And who's going to buy me some shit? You.
–33rd & 6th
Overheard by: EthanK
Homeless man, watching cute little mouse: That mouse is aggressive! It'll attack you if provoked.
–Central Park
Concerned Long Island tween, pointing at a rat in the tracks: Oh my god, how did a squirrel get in here? Seriously, we should help it.
–W 4th St Station
Father to daughters, with head cocked up listening to dark void in the platform: Hear that, girls? The rats are playing.
–96th & Broadway Subway Platform
Overheard by: sueinthecity
Random blond chick: I don't wanna be the fricking mouse.
–Asian Restaurant, Chinatown
Dude: I was raised with rodents.
–Hunter College
Eight-year-old Italian kid to another: Hey, you know that bracelet you got at the feast? The next day I saw a mouse with it around his neck, swear to god!
–Lorimer & Maujer, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Natalya Petrovna
Woman: So my friend was going to vote for Obama, but now, since her boyfriend is from, like, Alaska, she's going to vote for McCain instead.
–Store, 2nd Ave
Woman to friend: Joe says he weighs 145 but he's a Republican. You can't trust anything he says.
–Pinetree Lodge, 35th & 1st
Hobo on street corner: Vote for McCain. Get nuclear rockets shot up your ass and eat moose burgers all day!
–W 3rd & MacDougal St
Overheard by: Matt
60-something woman dressed like teenybopper, talking about Sarah Palin on cell: She proves you can be pretty and smart. She's more than a bulldog in a pantsuit; she's like Alaska Barbie!
–Penn Station
Yuppie dad to whiny daughter: Barack Obama doesn't like it when his daughters whine.
–Caroll Gardens
Middle-aged, white man on cell: Do not call me at this number again. Never call me at this number again. Listen, if you call me at this number again I will, in fact, vote for John McCain.
–Tea Lounge, Cobble Hill
Ghetto mother to obnoxiously loud child: Stop it! Stop it! I said stop it! Oooh, girl I am gonna sell yo ass for a Lexus and a mansion if you don't stop!
–L Train
Mother to small child lagging behind: Do you want to go home with another family?
–South St Seaport
Overheard by: shopgirl
Grandmother to small grandson: You went potty, Nietzsche? That's very good. Nana is coming over later, Nietzsche.
–Carl Schurz Park
Mother, to kid peeing on street: Michael, we don't pee on other people's doors!
–Central Park West
Overheard by: Nikki
Mother, to kid looking at toys: It's not a toilet, it's to make cupcakes.
–Toys "R" US, Times Square
Overheard by: Howie
Father, to five-year-old son: I had no idea you liked AC/DC!
–Penn Station
Mother, to son in stroller watching two shady characters: Oh, a drug deal! Sam*, your first drug deal encounter.
–81st & Amsterdam
Overheard by: andrew daly
40-something Spanish woman to 15-year-old son: What kind of a retard are you? You're just like your father!
(son looks around nervously)
Father, standing next to her: Wait, what?
–Canal & Centre
Overheard by: Einstien
7-year old looking at toy ad: I want this and this…
Dad: Do you have money to buy them? Because I am not going to, and nothing in life is free.
7-year old: What about those papers you take every morning from that man? You don't pay him.
(dad goes quiet)
–5 Train
Overheard by: Guy
Father: We might not make it home in time for church.
Little boy: Hallelujah! We're gonna miss church!
–Bus to Staten Island
Father: Hurry up or we'll be late! If we're late mommy is gonna spank you!
Toddler son: (shocked look)
Father: I'm kidding, mommy would never spank you, mommy would spank daddy.
Toddler son: Mommy spanks daddy?
Father (with a devious smile): Mommy spanks daddy all the time!
–Sheep Meadow, Central Park
Three-year-old girl, pointing to a page in Eric Carle's The Mixed-Up Chameleon: Why does he have an umbrella?
Dad: Some people have to wear umbrellas all the time, otherwise they'll get lots of freckles or end up with squamous cell carcinoma and die.
–B Train
Overheard by: sometimesdee
Father to bored seven-year-old son: I have the Post and the Daily News, which one do you want?
Son: (takes newspaper skeptically)
Father: Go to page six.
Son: Why?
Father: That's where the girls in bikinis are.
–Penn Station
