Teenage girl: I'm so happy! Nick* friended me on Facebook!
Teenage boy: That's because he was high.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Teenage girl: I'm so happy! Nick* friended me on Facebook!
Teenage boy: That's because he was high.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Physics teacher: Who wants to read problem five?
Girl in front of room: Who wants to drink cyanide for breakfast?
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Boy to girl bending down at her locker: You shouldn't be bending like that, girl.
Girl, yelling after him: You don't tell me how to bend!
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Black man in Batman suit trying to get tourists to pay to take pictures with him: I got bills! I got bills!
–Times Square
Overheard by: kpan
Traffic cop, motioning in vain for car to stop: I guess my powers aren't working today…
–Citifield, 7 Train Entrance
Teenage girl: I love my physics teacher. He's like a fat, middle-aged Superman.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Large man with heavy accent shouting into cell: Please send somebody–I have just been robbed. (pause) I am on the corner. (pause) What do you mean, "white"? He is a Spiderman! He's wearing a Spiderman suit!
–Stanton & Essex
Girl #1: Can you hear music up your nose?
Girl #2: That is the most amazing thing you have ever said.
–Bard High School
Overheard by: Sunny
Girl #1: Where are your testicles today?
Girl #2: (stares at her)
Girl #1: Oh, fuck. I meant “spectacles”.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Confused student: Wait, who did Obama run against?
Smart student: McCain!
Confused student I though Bush ran against McCain.
Smart student: No! Bush and McCain are in the same party.
Confused student: Right. (pause) Wait, Bush is a Republican?
–High School
Boy #1: Dude, do you speak Japanese?
Boy #2: That's what she said!
Boy #1: What?
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Large group of people dressed like Santa: What do we want? Christmas! When do we want it? Now!
–Washington Square
Overheard by: TR
Gay guy on cell: You don't want to see white Christmas. Honey, you don't understand… That was the whitest Christmas I have ever seen.
–Broadway & 43rd
20-something woman to 20-something guy, in April: It wouldn't be Christmas without you.
–Stromboli's Pizza
Mom to child yelling at her: Who do you think you're talking to? That's it, Christmas is over for you!
–135th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Yowza
Normal-looking woman to no one in particular: Look at Santa. The same letters as "Satan." Do you think Christmas has anything to do with Jesus? Where in the Bible does it say Jesus was born on December 24th? I tell you, Santa is Satan.
–Xmas Tree Stand, High School
Staples employee, in response to radio: Man! I want to move to Vietnam, or Pakistan, or wherever the fuck they don't care about Christmas.
–Staples, Union Square
Overheard by: Damon H.
Man to friend during interval: Have you heard about the Scientology Christmas pageant?
–Carnegie Hall
Guy to girlfriend: How can you be really scared for 2012 when you thought it was 2013?
–Franklin & Eastern Parkway
Seven-year-old boy on bike, turning corner into small white dog: Shoooooooooooot son, that dog just scared the black out of me!
–Nostrand Ave & Prospect Pl
Overheard by: melyssalaree
Crazy guy, after screaming unintelligibly in 20-something's face: It's cool, I'm supposed to scare people! I'm the anti-Christ!
–Ave A b/w 5th & 6th St
Girl: I'm really scared I'm gonna be a sex addict. Like, I'm hoping it won't happen, but it probably will.
–High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
