Hobo: Hey, does anyone have some spare chicken?
Girl: Ha, ha, “chicken”? Sorry, I only had room for one rotisserie in my bag…and this one’s for me.
–L train
Overheard by: diana
Hobo: Hey, does anyone have some spare chicken?
Girl: Ha, ha, “chicken”? Sorry, I only had room for one rotisserie in my bag…and this one’s for me.
–L train
Overheard by: diana
Mom about baby crying in stroller: Ugh, I gotta go feed him.
Friend: You want me to do it?
Mom: Um, I breastfeed.
Friend: I could give it a whirl.
–Washington Square Park
Girl: Man, this old dyke is digging on me, but I want some penis
these days.
–3rd between B & C
Guy: Man, old pussy is the best! She has 50 years of dick sucking experience.
–124th & Manhattan
Overheard by: Jason Steinhauer
Queer on cell: Ever since I lost my hair I’ve had 20 year olds chasing me around like I’m an ice cream cone.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Squatporpoise
Girl: Oh yeah, that guy you saw me with Sunday? He lets me watch him have sex with boys.
–NYU School of social work
Overheard by: Maggie
Anorexic #1: I didn't not eat for three days, I just didn't really…
Anorexic #2: Eat?
Anorexic #1: Yeah.
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: the expeditor
NYU boy #1: The French used to be all militaristic, like, back in the time of Napoleon.
NYU boy #2: Yeah, but now they’re just all about wine and cheese.
NYU boy #1: Yeah… Cheese is good, though.
NYU boy #2: True, very true.
–Silver Center, NYU
Overheard by: Sam
Assistant: Probably not, I don’t see them as Miracle Whip people.
Boss: How many times do you have to tell that story?
–23rd & 6th
Overheard by: Dave
Guy #1: Yo, come and get some falafel with me.
Guy #2: Waffles?
Guy #1: No man, falafel. Trust me, it's mad good.
Guy #2: What is it?
Guy #1: Shit, I can't even explain it. It's like… chicken and waffles.
–Mamoun's Restaurant
Lady #1, pointing at imitation Cap'n Crunch: Get those, it's the same thing.
Lady #2: No, he won't eat those.
Lady #1: Well, then he's an asshole.
–Atlantic Ave, Brooklyn
Asian girl: I don’t know why, but I heard that all filipino people, all they eat is chicken wings.
Asian guy: What did you say?
Asian girl: Seriously, my maid, my boyfriend’s maid, my sister’s maid, all they ate was chicken wings.
–44th & 5th
Overheard by: Ahmad Zubair Sahar
New Waiter: So I learned a secret tonight. The words “Cheers” and “Brilliant” apparently mean “I’m going to leave you a bad tip”.
Old Waiter: You’re just now learning that? That’s Day One shit.
–Capital Grille, Midtown
Overheard by: Greg Rutter
