Asian tourist: Excuse me. Excuse me!
Guy: Yeah?
Asian tourist, pointing at random building: Is that the Empire State Building?!
Guy: Yes.
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: Priscilla Perez
Asian tourist: Excuse me. Excuse me!
Guy: Yeah?
Asian tourist, pointing at random building: Is that the Empire State Building?!
Guy: Yes.
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: Priscilla Perez
White guy #1: I was listening to Celia Cruz.
Spanish guy: Yeah, I've been to Santa Cruz.
White guy #2: What? Santa Claus?
–48th & 6th
Businessguy: It’s a small world.
Businesschick: Especially in Astoria!
Businessguy: Ha, ha, ha!
Businesschick: Hee, hee.
–Midtown office
Spanish babysitter: These people are working me to death. They have me doing all their errands.
French babysitter: I know.
Spanish babysitter: I hate my job!
Four-year-old boy: No, you can't say that. You should always say “I don't like my job.”
–72nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: z
American tourist #1: Wow, your English is really good!
Scottish tourist: Um, thank you.
American tourist #2: Yes, it's really very good. You sound like a native speaker. What language do you normally speak in Scotland, anyway?
Scottish tourist: English.
–Empire State Building
Overheard by: rachel
Foreign TA: I don't understand why they use the egg for Easter.
American TA: Oh, it doesn't really have anything to do with Easter, we just appropriated pagan rituals.
Foreign TA: I thought Easter is when Jesus was reborn.
American TA: It is.
Foreign TA: I thought maybe he was reborn out of an egg.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: MCLD
Foreigner: She is lovely. But growing like a cow.
American friend: She is bit of a pork chop.
Foreigner: But she does not look like a man. Which is a good thing.
–6 Train
Student #1: She’s from the Dominican Republic, right?
Student #2: Um, yeah, I think so.
Student #1: Is she classy…?
Student #2: Eh, not really, no. At the meeting the other day, she was wearing a skirt. I could see her cooch.
Student #3: [Just joining the conversation] What’s a cooch?
[Silence.]Student #1: Her vagina.
Student #2: Her forest. Except it was barren. There were no trees. Barren.
–Columbia University
Australian tourist: Excuse me, mate, do you know where Hooters is?
Guy: Yeah, go up to 56th, take a left. It’s between 7th and Broadway on the right.
Australian tourist: Thanks mate!
Guy to friend: Hey, I just got taken for a straight New Yorker.
–54th St & Madison
Overheard by: The other gay Bostonian
Girl: So where's he from? He's from California, right?
Guy: No, he's from England.
Girl: Oh, Montreal!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Christopher Columbus
