Guy: I’ve started calling vaginas “Panninis.”
Girl: You dug this hole!
Guy: Yeah, and now I’m gonna bury myself in it -which is great, because it’s the perfect size to fit my dead corpse!
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Therese
Guy: I’ve started calling vaginas “Panninis.”
Girl: You dug this hole!
Guy: Yeah, and now I’m gonna bury myself in it -which is great, because it’s the perfect size to fit my dead corpse!
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Therese
Girl in crowded elevator: You're not sweating. It must not be hot.
Guy: Yeah, but my tongue is blistering. I should probably see a doctor.
–7th Ave
Thug to friend: That bitch looked up at me and said, "Damn, your dick tastes like coffee."
–86th St & Lexington
Overheard by: TINA
Female suit to other: Duane Reade is like the Starbucks of drugstores!
–Duane Reade
Old lady with shopping cart, exiting voting booth: Where's my Starbucks coupon?
–PS163, Bath Beach, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Torgo61
Guy on cell: Hey, bro! I'm having coffee and a bagel. (pause) No, an animal did not have to die for me to have this coffee!
–Arthur Avenue
Overheard by: eternal student
Man with heavy Indian accent holding a cup of Starbucks coffee: No, the most expensive coffee in the world is coffee beans eaten and then pooped out by a cat. It's $120 a cup.
–Elevator, 7th Ave & 31st St
Girl: How was your date last night?
Guy: He had a sick body but an ugly face. I slept with him anyway.
–84th St & 2nd Ave
Guy #1: You ho!
Guy #2: I am nobody's gardening instrument!
–NYU
Guy on Cell: Have you ever tried to masturbate while Michael Jackson’s “Rock With You” is playing in the background? Well, it’s more difficult than you think…
–Port Authority
Overheard by: Michael Roche
Hipster guy #1: Dude, it's so cold…did you just pee your pants?
Hipster guy #2: I did. I peed my pants, everybody! I peed them!
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: youknowme
Guy with clipboard: Hey there! Do you have a minute for gay rights?
Gay dude: Every minute of my life is for gay rights.
Guy with clipboard: Are you aware that there are people in Washington trying to take your rights away?
Gay dude: No shit! That's not news! Leave me alone!
–16th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: mille shayntwright
Guy: Guess how much I paid for that fucking hamburger?
Girl: How much?
Guy: 32 dollars! No hamburger is worth 32 dollars.
–NYU Dorm
Girl to friend: You have to stop setting your brother on fire.
–Broadway
Overheard by: sandm
Student to professor: Urinating on fire? What the hell, Freud?
–Wagner College, Staten Island
Tool on cell: If burning leaves in the schoolyard is wrong, I don’t wanna be right!
–E 44th St & 2nd Ave
Blond woman: And that was the night I burned my eyebrows off!
–Union Square
Some guy: I spent all of last night searching my body for it, but I promise you if I find it, I’ll burn it.
–The Village
Older woman at art gallery, looking at the price list: That burns my ass. Sorry, but that burns my ass.
–57th St
