Girl: He had so much damn earwax!
Guy: Girl, I know… Sleeping with boys like that is just so awkward.
–The Hudson Hotel
Girl: He had so much damn earwax!
Guy: Girl, I know… Sleeping with boys like that is just so awkward.
–The Hudson Hotel
Conductor: Barf between the cars, asshole!
–PATH train
Girl on phone: Well… We can cuddle, and then I’ll be like, ‘Get off!’ and then I’ll puke, okay?
–JJ’s Place, Columbia University
Overheard by: Rachel Lindsay
Girlfriend pushing drunken boyfriend through crowd, to bystander: Work with me here, baby — he’s throwing up all over you, and you’re still not moving.
–Rained-out Game Two, Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: Alison Steedman & Jeff Gilbert
Woman: There’s no better time to scream your boyfriend’s name than when you’re puking all over his bed.
–Party, 16th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: McFreaky
Little girl: 50 dollars. But if you vomit, it’s free!
–76th & Central Park West
Overheard by: Rachel
Lady with accent pointing at man hunched over seat: Oh, is he throw up?
–4 train
Overheard by: fellow rider who also didn’t sit
Little boy to baby brother: Stop throwing up on me!
–3rd Ave & 16th St
Overheard by: Rachel W.
Lady: I was down in Tijuana getting some dental work done, and I fell asleep in the chair. Best sleep I ever had! They should sedate me more often.
Girl (under her breath): I couldn’t agree more.
–audience waiting room for the Tony Danza Show
Overheard by: Renee B.
Guy: You in need of a husband?
Woman: I’ve got the clap.
–N train
Overheard by: Camille Marquis
Gay boyfriend #1: I'm so disappointed. I really didn't like that as much as mine.
Gay boyfriend #2: You think yours is better?
Gay boyfriend #1: Definitely! Next time I'm bringing my own soap.
–City Opera
Overheard by: Morning Glory
Teen scene girl: And that's a whole fucking different story! You always said you wanted to die having a heart attack in a car!
–57th & 3rd
Overheard by: Duluthian
Guy in line: I haven't had a corn dog since Jim Belushi died.
–Nathan's, Coney Island
Creepy guy on cell: Hey. Did you hear about the Craigslist killer? Yeah, isn't that a great idea?
–Penn Station
20-something irritated man on cell: Dude, stop freaking out! They're probably not going to do the autopsy for another three days.
–8th Ave & 15th St
Conductor: Please, no one cross cars, if the train makes a turn you will fall through, get crushed and die, thank you and have a lovely evening. Oh, and it's lovely to be alive.
–Amtrak Train to Penn Station
Overheard by: Paige
Guy #1: I took the day off. I’m going up to Long Island City to see the doctor.
Guy #2: Oh yeah? What’s the matter?
Guy #1: I have to get this boil looked at.
Guy #2: Sorry to hear that.
Guy #1: Yeah, well…normally it’s not a problem. I just pop it and it all goes away, but this one, man, I’ve popped it three times and it’s still big and painful as hell. Normally I don’t complain about these things, but man, this one is right below my balls…and it’s killing me! They tell me it’s a hair growing the wrong way. How does a hair do that?
–A train
Middle aged man: I feel as though methamphetamines don't destroy your mind so much as ruin your body and make you cover it in tattoos. It's not like they were on heroin.
Companion, nodding his head: Mmm-hmm.
–5th St & 19th St
Little girl: Mommy, how old will I be when I have sex?
–18th & Broadway
Overheard by: Mayde and Daniel
Sleazy woman: You can stay over my place, and I'll blow ya and stuff, but would ya mind if we didn't screw? I'm still gettin' over a pregnancy.
Sleazier man: Well, it's not like contagious or anything…
–Night Club, Midtown
