Woman, clearly winding up a long rant: …and that's why I don't need no fuckin' man in my life!
Toddler son: Mmmmmhmm, mommy.
–Fort Greene, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Katie Naum
Woman, clearly winding up a long rant: …and that's why I don't need no fuckin' man in my life!
Toddler son: Mmmmmhmm, mommy.
–Fort Greene, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Katie Naum
Drunk woman to another: Well, I will see your divorce and raise you an illegitimate pregnancy!
–Court St & Atlantic Avenue, Brooklyn
Girl to super skinny girl: You look pregnant, I think I have a clothes hanger in my locker. You wanna come up and check with me?
–1st Ave & 3rd St
Dad holding baby to wife with another kid in stroller: Somebody's about to get pregnant up in here… It'll be like Maury Povich.
–Downtown 1 Train
Overheard by: NOT the father
Dude on bus to child: See, women, they get to grow people. And in exchange, we get to pee standing up.
–Q64 Bus
Overheard by: a people-grower
Girl to friend: You always seem to get pregnant at the worst times.
–Queens Center Mall
Overheard by: Jenn
Girl to friend: I'm feeling fertile. Who's going to tend to that feeling for me?
–2 Train
Latino guy to friends: That's what my name means in Portuguese, "pregnancy test positive."
–84th Drive, Queens
Future soccer mom #1: Oh, our two-year-old's day care is very New York.
Future soccer mom #2: How so?
Future soccer mom #1: They have a yoga instructor in the afternoons and a French teacher comes at least once a week.
Future soccer mom #2: Well, that kind of exposure is important at that age.
–Greenwich Village
Overheard by: Izzy
Three-year-old boy: Mommy, I want a little brother, let's get one.
Mom: You can't just go to the store to get a baby.
Seven-year-old girl: I know where babies come from.
Mom: Oh, man!
Three-year-old boy: From where?
Seven-year-old girl: God. God made everything, people and animals.
Three-year-old boy: Who's god?
Seven-year-old girl: I don't know, some dead guy who lives in heaven.
–Riverbank State Park
Overheard by: Darin
Red haired teen: Aw, they're sold out! We're not gonna get to see the naked people!
Mom: Don't worry, honey, we'll see them another time.
–Outside Al Hirschfeld Theatre
Little girl to stray cat: Meow. Meowwwww!
Mother to stray cat, pulling the girl away: Woof! Woooof!
–Chinatown
Overheard by: Susan
Angry mom holding to seven-year-old daughter: It's fucking hot!
Seven-year-old daughter: It's okay, mom. It'll be okay.
–Rego Park, Queens
Mother to teenage burnout daughter, holding corn pops: I'm not buying these for you… they're like styrofoam!
Teenage burnout daughter, yelling down aisle: They're delicious! And I dreamed about them last night!
(mother puts cereal back into cart and dances to her cell phone ringtone)
–Gristedes, 168th St
Upset four-year-old girl, looking at tapestries of unicorns: But mom!
Mother: These are fakes, silly. There are no real unicorns here. We're not at a zoo!
–The Cloisters
Overheard by: Rebecca
Mother to little girl: Dammit! Stop that, you are not a cat!
Friend: What's she doing?
Mother: She's licking me! She meows too!
Little girl: Meow!
Female passenger: Meow!
(pause)
Little girl: Meow?
Female passenger: Meow!
–M15 Bus
Overheard by: Kat
