Preppy white girl, about friend's shirt: I wanna party like a rock star!
Punk guy friend: So you want to play a show, shoot up heroin, fuck a stranger, then do it all again in another state the next night?
Preppy white girl: I don't wanna fuck strangers!
–Queensboro Plaza
Overheard by: diex-romantic
Young son: Daddy, look! It's a doggy!
Preppy father: Yeah, it's a dog, son. Give it a break.
Bystander: Father of the year!
–Union Square
Overheard by: likes dogs
Guy on cell: There's a lot bruacracy in public social work…
–Eastern Parkway & New York Ave
Overheard by: jeff
Woman on phone: Her mother is a bird. Her whole family is a flock of birds. I cannot even say how ghetto she is. She said, "columinate." I said, what? You mean "a-coom-a-late?
–1 Train
Preppy on cell: What's your next class? Professional rioting?
–Fordham
Girl: This class is skewered. There are only three guys and like twenty girls. Damn!
–Brooklyn College
Overheard by: Phil
Guy to girl on train: She's just like "huh, brutha." It's like, embedded in them. They were breaded that way.
–7 Train
Preppy girl, confused: Where are we right now?
Preppy guy: I don't even know.
Preppy girl: Where is the heart of Williamsburg? Is there even a heart of Williamsburg?
–The Brooklyn Kitchen, Williamsburg
Out-of-place preppy: Hey, I think that's Grace. Isn't that Grace, dude? Grace! Grace!
Not Grace: Nope, sorry. It's Beth, actually. (keeps walking)
Not Grace's girlfriend: You know, you didn't have to tell them your real name.
Not Grace: I know, I just got excited.
–2nd Ave
Overheard by: Also Not Grace.
Preppy blonde: So like, you know how it kinda hurts when your tampon gets too full?
Flamboyantly gay friend: Oh, yeah, I hate that.
–A Train
Hobo, approaching preppy teens: Hey do y'all have some money so I could repair the motor on my giant helicopter?
Preppy teenage girl: Uh, sure.
Preppy teenage boy: Yeah, only because that's the coolest fucking reason ever.
–7th Ave & 11th St
Overheard by: Horchata
20-something tourist chick, screaming: I love New York!
20-something preppy black guy: Well, it doesn't love you back, so shut the fuck up.
–7th Ave & W 55th St
Overheard by: KC
50-year-old man with limited teeth: Do you know what time it is?
Attractive young preppy girl: Quarter to four.
50-year-old man with limited teeth: It's a quarter til I make sweet love to you.
–R Train
Overheard by: The mind boggles
30-something blonde in office attire on cell: You need to tell Vanessa that she can't be on the show because she's not overweight enough, and s not unattractive enough.
–Whole Foods Market, Chelsea
Syracuse University girl, going up escalator: I feel like I'm in Star Trek! (begins humming Indiana Jones theme)
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Mickey
20-something gaysian: Yeah, he watches Hannah Montana so I don't get why he makes fun of me for watching iCarly!
–Washington Square Park
Teen: I watched I Love Lucy last night. She's funny; she's like the Jim Carrey of the 1920s or something.
–UA School of Music and Art
20-something preppy kid to mother: You know, they really should have a reality show about Midtown.
–54th St b/w 1st & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Pedro
