College guy to friends: Where does the z train go?
Friend #1: Never heard of it before.
Friend #2: It's probably that train in the third Matrix movie.
–Canal St
Overheard by: justin
College guy to friends: Where does the z train go?
Friend #1: Never heard of it before.
Friend #2: It's probably that train in the third Matrix movie.
–Canal St
Overheard by: justin
Crazy Asian bag lady: My pasta! Who took my pasta!? You! (points to yuppie guy) You took it!
Yuppie guy: Lady, does it look like I need your pasta?
Crazy Asian bag lady: Calm down, asshole, it's just pasta. I think I told David he could have it.
–W 52nd
Girl yuppie: Isn’t it crazy how rapidly presidents age over eight years?
Guy yuppie: Oh I know, all the stress.
Girl yuppie: If Hil wins president, she’s gonna be a hot mess.
Guy yuppie: She’ll look like Margaret Thatcher after three months!
–Metro North
Overheard by: Sromeo
Guy (kissing his girl's neck, begging): C'mon baby, please?
Girl: I said “No.”
Guy: Why not?
Girl: Because it gets too messy. I mean, I already have to keep washing all the pillows you cum on. Imagine the mess if I'm on the rag.
–R Train
Overheard by: Kim
Woman: Where are you going on your vacation?
Man with suitcase: I'm gonna go down south, drink a few piña coladas, and smoke a lot of pot!
–Metro-North
Overheard by: sounds relaxing
Tween girl #1: Where did the term, “horny” come from?
Tween girl #2: Because when guys are horny, that's what their dicks look like. Horns.
Tween girl #1: Then how come we use the word for chicks, too?
Tween girl #2: Because their nipples get hard and look like horns! God, you're so stupid!
–Central Park
Guy #1: Those pants are cute. Did you buy them with the paint on them?
Guy #2: No, I was painting last weekend.
–68th St Loews Theater
Overheard by: amalthya
White girlfriend to Asian boyfriend intentionally blocking the door: What are you, 12 years old?
Asian boyfriend: Only from the waist down.
–76th & Columbus
Girl on train: Excuse me, don't touch my bag.
Young thug: I am just tryin to close your zipper.
Girl: Yeah, and then you take my wallet!
Thug: Why you think I am gonna take yo wallet? Because I'm black?
Girl: No, because I heard you tell your friend “I'imma steal this bitch's wallet.”
Thug: Oh.
–A Train
Girl at make-up counter: Where was yous at during the tornado yesterday?
Customer: Huh?
Girl at make-up counter: Guess you didn’t got one, then.
–Kaufmann’s, Walden Galleria
Overheard by: Rachel + Isaac
