Man giving out rap CDs: Yo! Check out my new CD, it’s only five dollars.
White man: Thanks, but we do not like rap.
Man giving out rap CDs: What are you, racist?
Man’s wife: Honey, I think we should go now.
–Times Square
Man giving out rap CDs: Yo! Check out my new CD, it’s only five dollars.
White man: Thanks, but we do not like rap.
Man giving out rap CDs: What are you, racist?
Man’s wife: Honey, I think we should go now.
–Times Square
Hobo, to commuters: I’m hungry, homeless, and unemployed. I’m selling these candies for $0.25 so I can buy a meal. You’re all going to die, and you can’t take it with you, so give it to me!
–Shuttle to Times Square
Overheard by: Wondering why he couldn’t just eat the candy…?
Girl: So she was like: "Why can’t we have a candy corn background?" and I was like "Because you’re an idiot!"
–Starbucks, 34th St
Overweight yet stylish gay man: She had a hunger deep inside her that only a Snickers could quench.
–M101 Bus
Overheard by: Holla Back Girl
Mother to young son: You can get something, but I don’t want you to pick out no fucking twenty dollar candy. You ain’t been that good.
–Hershey World, Times Square
Overheard by: esgeness
Professor to student: I found out what they put in their brownies, I plan to use it against them!
–101st & Broadway
Group of high school girls to Mister Softee ice cream truck driver: Hey ice cream man! Ice cream man! Give us some ice cream! We’ll suck you off!
–Beverley & Ocean Parkway
Overheard by: A Radiant Sulk Ninja
Middle-aged suit #1: So I’m going to be a father again.
Middle-aged suit #2: Oh, really?
Middle-aged suit #1: Yeah, the mother’s some bimbo on the West Side.
Middle-aged suit #2: Oh yeah.
Middle-aged suit #1: Yeah. I figure if I’m going to fuck up my life, I might as well do it in grand fashion.
–Times Square
British girl #1: I’m hungry.
British girl #2: You know, we should eat at McDonald’s.
British girl #1: Are you for serious?
British girl #2: No, it was just jokesies.
British girl #1: Well, it was not funny, Angeline!
–Times Square
Dude on cell: I’m okay with it. As long as nobody slaps me or calls me gay or spits on me. Those are my three things. As long as nobody does those three things.
–21st St & 8th Ave
Asian girl: You gave me the gay!
–C Train
Overheard by: Jordan
Female cop to male cop: You a queer? For real, you queer? You a queer? You a queer? Oh, I didn’t know that. Okay. [Nods.]
–C Train
Barnard girl to friends: I don’t think he’s gay, I just think he has problems having sex with women.
–Columbia University Steps
Overheard by: John Jay
Man to friend: See, I told you this was a gay neighborhood, look at all the women!
–Montague Street, Brooklyn Heights
Overheard by: glekapolis
Loudly homophobic guy: Gay! Gay! My ass hurts from watching that preview!
–AMC Theater, Times Square
Overheard by: Lo
Tourist husband with camera: We could ask him. [Points to black man.]Tourist wife: No, I don’t think thats a good idea.
Black man: Listen to your woman, I woulda taken that shit and run!
–Times Square
[several jews are chanting and marching in times square, waving yellow flags.]Guy #1: What are they protesting?
Guy #2: I don’t know. It’s in hebrew.
–Times Square
Headline by: Q6
Runners-Up:
· “At Least They’re Supporting the Troops” – Eli
· “They’re Saying, “Can You Believe the Yellow Ones Were 50% Off?”” – seven5suited
Bossy, fanny-pack-wearing tourist lady: No, no… That map is wrong. We want Broadway and it’s … That way! [Points emphatically toward 8th avenue and storms away.]
–West 47th b/w Broadway & 8th Avenue
Overheard by: tinyfoo
Tourist, whispering to friend: There are a lot of Jewish people in here.
–B&H Photo
Tourist girl: Dad! Look! It’s Times Square! Walk this way.
–Rector St & Broadway
Overheard by: Jax
Tourist lady peering in shop window: Ooooh, calendars! Ooooh, t-shirts! Oh, we’re gonna have to come back here!
–48th & Broadway
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Tourist: Oh honey, look at this purse I bought! It’s a real coach bag and it was so cheap. I bought it on Canal street. You should see all of the Gucci, Prada, and Louis Vuitton they’ve got. I can’t believe you can get the real thing for so cheap.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Johanna
Tourist, in disbelief: People are buying shoes at 11 o’clock at night!
–33rd & Seventh
Overheard by: Gasp!
Older woman: Oh, is this your first baby?
Young pregnant girl: No, this is my last baby!
–Times Square Station
Young lawyer: My little boy finally made the transition from diapers to "big boy" underwear. On his first day back to pre-school he dropped his trousers and showed the whole class his lightning McQueens.
Young lawyer: … And it created a domino effect of three-year-olds showing their undies.
–6 Train
Overheard by: POLA
Chick on cell: Better underwear than meth!
–Harlem
Overheard by: McFreaky
Boyfriend to girlfriend looking at lingerie in window: It’s kind of cold for that.
–University & 9th
Overheard by: Mary Crippen
Skank: So I’m thinking "Now I’ve got to get rid of those panties!"
–54th & 9th
Overheard by: thats gross
Earnest teen chick, calling to retreating waitress: Do you sell thongs? I’m serious, I really need them!
–Hard Rock Cafe, Times Square
Overheard by: Amanda
Man getting into elevator: … And she was all like "Hi, whatchu doin’?" And I was like "Whaaaat?" I didn’t know what to say, she was all over me, I could see her panties. [Everyone in elevator looks at him and laughs a little.] I mean, come on, we’re all adults in here. What was I supposed to do? Smile? Say "Hi" back?
–Elevator, Empire State Building
