Compare/Contrast

Girl #1: But, she's going to college and you're not going to college.
Girl #2: I am too.
Girl #1: Yeah, but, community college.

–F Train

Overheard by: Kate

Nervous hipster: You know, it's really true what they say about friends with eczema…

–50th & 8th

Overheard by: chris

Guy on cell: So she got cancer, big fuckin deal!

–1st Ave & St. Mark's

Man on cell: Next time they call, just politely say there's no one here with diabetes.

–Central Park

Overheard by: Lola Black

Woman exiting car: There's this bump between my ass and cooch. I think I should get that checked.

–W 4th St

20-something guy to 40-something woman: Look, I'm not saying I'm not concerned about my hand being sticky, but I'm more concerned about malaria.

–Café

Girl #1: Ugh, Adam Lambert is soooo hot, it's too bad he's gay.
Girl #2: Just because he kisses other guys doesn't mean he's gay.
Girl #1: Um, I'm pretty sure that's exactly what it means. Now, come on, I feel like a slurpie or something.

–59th & 5th

Chinese girl: I just think it would be a little weird.
Jewish girl: Why?
Chinese girl: ‘Cause I’m not Jewish.
Jewish girl: What are you talking about? You’re Chinese. That’s practically Jewish.
Chinese girl: …True.

–SoHo

Dad: King of the Hill?
Six-year-old daughter: Yeah!
Dad: Simpsons?
Six-year-old daughter: Yeah!
Dad: Alf?
Six-year-old daughter: Noooooooo.

–117th & Broadway

Woman #1: Oh my god, I can't believe you said that!
Woman #2: Shut up, I did not just say that!
Woman #1: You just said that.
Woman #2: When did I say that?
Woman #1: You like *just* said that!

–Starbucks, Battery Park Plaza

60-something white woman: They put on a good show. Those Jesuits really know how to party!

–Penn Station

Overheard by: Jeff

Gay man to others, about parties: Yeah, I thought about going to the black party, but I'm not that gay!

–7th Ave & 6th St

Overheard by: NottRob

Young woman: I'm twenty-seven. I've never been to a party, a sexy party, where I don't remember who I've slept with.

–21st St & Lexington

Overheard by: Jonas

Chick on cell: I can't. It's my cousin's chihuahua's birthday party.

–28th St & Lexington

Overheard by: sounds like a rager

(little Asian girl giggles and makes snorting noise)
Park Slope mom to daughter: She's making a pig noise, Charlotte! Can you show her your pig noise?
(little Asian girl snorts again)
Park Slope mom: I think she's going to hock something up.

–F Train

Overheard by: Russ Wall

Texan dude: Have you ever noticed how everyone on this train is small?
Female companion: Hunh.
Texan dude: Maybe it’s ’cause they come from third world countries. Malnourished and stuff.

–L train, Grand

Overheard by: Joe Roumeliotis

Girl on cell: So I asked my doorman if I brought anyone home with me last night and he said he didn’t know! I told him it’s his job to know!

–Outside 145th subway station

Hipster girl: Santa is a man whore!

–45th & 8th

College girl: And then we’re having what I thought was a nice one night stand, and then, he’s all like "what are you doing?"

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: silvver

Indian girl: I need to up my sex number. I either wanna sleep with a professor or a celebrity. (long pause) Wait! Professors are like celebrities!

–72nd and Amsterdam

Overheard by: Vincent

Teen girl to friend: … And then my mom said to me "don’t be a ho."

–Union Square

Overheard by: Lotte

Girl: She is such a fuckin’ slut. (Pause, then indignantly) How you gonna sleep with someone for four dollars?

–Bergen and Smith