Young hot guy #1: I want you to know you really were considerate when you fucked me. I mean, I'm not easy.
Young hot guy #2: I try to help out.
–Union Square
Young hot guy #1: I want you to know you really were considerate when you fucked me. I mean, I'm not easy.
Young hot guy #2: I try to help out.
–Union Square
Guy #1: …and then I came in and Anne was watching some gay movie with Keanu Reeves and River Phoenix–
Guy #2: Who’s River Phoenix?
Guy #1: You know, Joaquin Phoenix’s brother.
Guy #2: Joaquin Phoenix has a brother?
Guy #1: I guess…
–A train
Hipster: Everyone I know is either married, divorced, gay or crazy.
–37th St, Astoria
Overheard by: Matthias Sundberg
Karaoke panhandler singing Gnarls Barkley: "Does that make me craaaaazy? Maybe I'm craaaaaazy!" It's Memorial Day and I'm sitting here singing to people I never met before in my life. Mmmmmm…craaaazy!
–Times Square Subway Station
Black woman to janitor companion: I am so glad I live in the ghetto. These motherfuckers down here are crazy! (companion nods) And I live in the ghe-tto, 2 train ghetto.
–22nd St & 5th Ave
Hobo, watching man and woman having sex against a statue: I think I'm going to have to move to Europe or something. This place is getting too crazy.
–Madison Square Park
Overheard by: Westsider
30-something guy on cell: Well, that's what my crazy sister said about my more crazy sister.
–Broadway & 114th St
Overheard by: mary e.
Little boy in abandoned shopping cart: I've gotta get off this crazy train!
–Target, Atlantic Ave
Gay guy #1: You're a single lady, though! It doesn't even matter!
Gay guy #2: Exactly. So I was all, “If you like it, then you should've just peed on it.”
–81st St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: a new beyonce fan
Guy in line for the bathroom: Man, it takes a lot of trust to let someone piss through your legs.
–Angelika Theater
Girl: If I had a barbecue on my stoop, three queens would pee on it on the first night. I mean, you'd think they wouldn't, since it's a historically gay street. But I've seen so many queens peeing on Christopher Street when it's nice out!
–28th & 5th
Overheard by: Donk
Really drunk girl: I have to pee so bad! I almost peed on the corner, but then I remembered I don't have a penis.
–14th St
NYU girl, immediately after taking shot of tequila: Guys, I have to pee, but I don't want to pee out the patron!
–NYU Dorm
NYU girl: I'm going to go see her! I sobered up for this! I drank tons of water! I could pee my ass out!
–8th & University
Short cop on his phone: Peed? You peed on the bed?
–21st St b/w 3rd & 2nd
Chick #1: Wait, you like pussy?
Chick #2: Well…
Chick #1, yelling: You like pussy! That’s amazing! This opens up so many options!
–Madison & Rutgers
20-something guy #1: Dude, that band was awesome!
20-something guy #2: I know! It makes me wish I were a chick, that way I could have that guy's babies.
20-something guy #1: Me too!
–Southpaw, Park Slope
Overheard by: esgeness
Hipster girl #1: I usually don’t mind, but this guy was like… I mean, basically you couldn’t tell if his shirt was on or off, he was that hairy!
Hipster girl #2: Yeah, I used to date a guy like that. You know those hair removal ads for men with the before and after pictures, where they basically take like the hairiest man that ever walked the earth? That was him. Chest, back, shoulders, ass… Covered.
Bear guy: Aw, come on. That’s just plain hot!
–Pink Pony, LES
(two guys bike past blowing a whistle and yelling, imitating a siren)
Old woman: Well, that about sums it up.
–Broadway & 19th
Overheard by: sweetchuck
Grandpa on cell: Okay, well, don't bump and grind with any boys!
–34th & 6th
Overheard by: Yours Truly
Older lady: I'm anti-tchotchke!
–Hudson & Bleecker
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Older woman gazing out at the pond: Well this is it! Scumbag park!
–Turtle Pond, Central Park
Overheard by: Confused
Old guy sitting on bench, to other: I'm gonna send your picture to Bellevue, so they can get the food ready for ya.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Lola
Old lady: The sex shops came in after the gays moved up from The Village in the 80s. But that's okay…
–8th Ave & 20th St
Elderly well-dressed lady to other (in front of bong shop): This place looks good.
–St. Mark's Place
Overheard by: Philouza
Skinny gay guy #1: Oh, I can't. It's drag queen puppet bingo night.
Skinny gay guy #2: It's the only one in town! We can't miss it!
–44th & 9th
