Guy #1: What baby?
Guy #2: No, I said I slept like a baby.
–8th Ave & 15th St
Guy #1: What baby?
Guy #2: No, I said I slept like a baby.
–8th Ave & 15th St
Guy #1: I have never peed on anyone!
Guy #2: Yeah, and Abraham Lincoln never told a lie.
–Manhattan & Kent, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Chris
Girl to coughing guy: Dude… Go to the doctor. You sound like the heroine of La Boheme right before the end of the third act.
Guy: Whatever that means?!
Girl: Means you're about to die of tuberculosis. Everyone in opera seems to die of tuberculosis. I mean, unless it's opera buffa, in which case everyone just ends up getting married after first switching places with really inadequate disguises… (pause) Sorry, ignore me…
Guy: No, that was quite interesting, actually…
–Mannes College of Music
Guy to friend: Yes, Braille… It's for the deaf people.
–The Met
Overheard by: david
Woman: Nothing says "ferry terminal" like fish with moustaches.
–Battery Maritime Building
Overheard by: Jon A.
Guy in quiet, crowded elevator: Do you know if jellyfish reproduce sexually?
–Google's NYC Office, 15th St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Derek
Teen girl to friend: But your shrimp ate a fish alive? Is that what happened? I don't believe you. Shrimp can't eat fish. It's like part of a food chain or something.
–Metro North Railroad
Overheard by: Jessica S.
Excited tourist girl among crowd of Chinese people: I can smell the fish!
–Grand Street Subway Station
Overheard by: Angelina
30-something female customer to H&M employee: Do I smell like I just ate fish?
–H&M
Overheard by: julia
Really drunk girl in front of gallery: I would fuck him for lobster!
–26st St & 10th Ave, Chelsea
Overheard by: Charlotte
Chubby Midwestern woman on cell: Yeah, I'm at Saks Fifth Avenue right now.
–Burger King
Overheard by: willy cheesesteak
Guy on cell: Yeah, I'm heading west on 23rd.
–1st Ave
Overheard by: Angela
Suit on cell, pacing around fountain: Yeah, baby I'm so sick, I could barely get out of bed this morning, I dragged myself to the kitchen. Didn't go to work or anything. Yeah, I think I'm just going to try to sleep it off, tonight. Guess dinner's off, sorry.
–Central Park Fountain
Overheard by: Knows Suits on cells are always lying
Man on cell, entering subway station: Yeah, I'm going to my limousine now, I'll talk to you later.
–Subway, 66th & Broadway
Dude in hoodie on cell, exiting subway: No, baby, I can't–I'm in Manhattan. No, I'm in Manhattan!
–86th St & 4th Ave, Bay Ridge
Man in jeans purchasing Doritos, on cell: Dude, I can't talk right now, I'm running in the marathon. Call you back in a few hours?
–Duane Reade, 87th & York
Overheard by: Upper East Sider
Guy #1: Did you know eating pussy was a hispanic thing?
Guy #2: No, I did not.
Guy #1: I don't like that word, though. There are nicer ways to say it.
Guy #2: Sorry… “Latino.”
–34th St & Houston
Overheard by: Daniel Ezra Johnson
Group of underage drunk girls: Yaaaayyyy!!! Woohoo! We loooovveee St. Patty's Day! Yeeeeaaaahhhh!
Guy: Yay! Drunk whores!
–52nd & 5th
Overheard by: plasticastle
Chelsea guy #1: Okay, it's the next stop, we have to decide who's having sex with him this time.
Chelsea guy #2: Not me, I had sex with him last time.
Chelsea guy #3: No! I had sex with him last time!
Chelsea guy #2: Whatever, that was just a hand job. It didn't count.
–Uptown 1 Train
