Guy #1: I can't believe you didn't go home with him. You're anti-sex.
Girl: He's a commuter! I'm not anti-sex! I'm anti-finding my way home from the suburbs.
Guy #2: You'd make a terrible hooker.
–54th & 9th
Overheard by: Bubbles
Guy #1: I can't believe you didn't go home with him. You're anti-sex.
Girl: He's a commuter! I'm not anti-sex! I'm anti-finding my way home from the suburbs.
Guy #2: You'd make a terrible hooker.
–54th & 9th
Overheard by: Bubbles
Girl: You have a rubber, right?
Guy (in Darth Vader voice): I find your lack of faith disturbing…
–Washington Square Park
Old man talking about his son: He's got eleven girls at a time.
Young guy: What is he…a dog walker?
–Elevator, 9th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Jeremy
Guy: So I'm only gonna work like two days a week now.
Girl: And I can be your sugar momma!
–10th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Lotte
Girl: Dude, good think Thom Yorke is a great musician, because that guy looks like my dog's ass.
Guy: If your dog's ass looks like Thom Yorke, I suggest you put that dog up for sale.
Girl: I would never sell my dog!
Guy: I would sell my dog on eBay in a heartbeat.
Girl: You can't sell animals on eBay.
Guy: I would sell my dog's leash and throw in the dog for free.
–Fordham Ram Van
Overheard by: sromeo
Guy on cell: But baby, it's a full body workout, depending on the position.
–Pratt Campus
Jogger on phone: I gotta stay in shape, you know? I'm not getting any younger. Even though the guys I graduated with look worse than I do.
–Marine Park, Brooklyn
Overheard by: wantsoutof_bklyn
Older lady to young male athletic facility employee: Do you have big balls? Exercise balls? I want bigger balls than you have there.
–NYU Palladium Athletic Facility, 140 E 14th St
Overheard by: JohnB
Large smoking man with burrito and Margarita: I can never work out, I'm too drunk all the time!
–Blockheads
Overheard by: how do you live?
Sassy black lady: Daaaamn! You're making me walk all the way to 45th Street?
–42nd St
Large Latina on cell: So I grabbed the baby and said "Kali! She likes this!" and started doing squats.
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: Russel
Guy #1: God, I'm tired.
Guy #2: Do you want me to punch you in the head or something?
–6th & Martin
Ghetto bum to Asian: Yo man, let me get yo seat.
Asian guy (calmly): Do I look Native American to you? You can't just come and take shit from me.
Bum: Oh, sorry about that! (he asks person next to him and gets a seat)
–2 Train
Overheard by: Seizure
Black guy #1: Nigga, fuck you! I'm straight.
Black guy #2: Nigga…you're straight gay.
–Roosevelt Ave Station
Overheard by: just straight
Disgruntled Yankee fan #1: Tigers suck!
Disgruntled Yankee fan #2: They just beat us, asshole.
–Outside Yankee Stadium, after 6-2 Loss to Detroit
Overheard by: Jake Elwell
