Girl: What are you eating?
Guy: I don’t know, I was just like, “Put whatever you want on bread.”
–Columbia University
Overheard by: helena vozhd
Girl: What are you eating?
Guy: I don’t know, I was just like, “Put whatever you want on bread.”
–Columbia University
Overheard by: helena vozhd
Girlfriend: I just don’t know what else I’d do for a career. I don’t know how to do anything else.
Boyfriend: That’s silly. You’d be a great secretary!
Boyfriend: What? I mean like a high powered executive secretary.
–1st & 1st
Guy: I need a cigarette…I need a cigarette…I need a cigarette!
Barista chick: Yeah, well I need a blunt but I can’t get one right now!
–Starbucks, 95th & Broadway
Overheard by: Caro
Girlfriend: Hey, there’s a Juilliard School in New York? I didn’t know that! There’s a Juilliard in Boston. It’s a music school.
Boyfriend: I don’t think there’s a Juilliard in Boston.
Girlfriend: Yes, there is! I went to it! The New York one must be, like, a branch of the Boston one. Like Penn State in New York or Ohio, or whatever.
–A train, 168th St
Overheard by: Girl in Juilliard T-Shirt
Girl #1: That’s a really nice tweed.
Girl #2: Oh, thanks. Wow.
Girl #1: Seriously, it’s amazing.
Girl #2: Yeah, I was really lucky.
–30th & 5th
Bodega guy: Hey, weren’t you at the Mets game?
Black guy: I’d rather be at a motherfuckin’ Ku Klux Klan rally.
–Bodega, Market & Monroe
Overheard by: benjamin lightle
Girl #1: I like your pants.
Girl #2: Thanks.
Girl #1: You don’t happen to have any percocets in them?
–Barnes and Noble ladies’ room, 48th & 5th
Ethan Hawke: Man, everybody’s fat.
–Employees Only, Hudson St
Overheard by: molly
Guy on cell: But you’re not fat in America!
–Ozzie’s Coffee III, 5th Ave, Park Slope
Girl: Wow, that was some pretty bad turbulence.
Guy: Yeah, I don’t think I’ll be having bowel movements for a week.
–LaGuardia
Overheard by: Jim D
Man, pointing at window display: That’ll make a nice gift for the wife: a pair of underwear that say “SALE” across the ass. Classy.
–Outside Victoria’s Secret, Herald Square
Overheard by: sean
Hipster chick: Quite frankly I’d rather wash all my bras tonight.
–F train
Overheard by: braincurve
Woman to five elderly ladies: All right, ladies, put your underwear on and let’s go.
–L&B Spumoni Gardens, 86th St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Ilysse Weisenfeld
Chick on cell: So how long did it take the four of you to find your bra the next morning?
–Harlem
Overheard by: Jess is hot.
Girl on cell: I am so not letting my underwear go on a date with his underwear.
–Prince & Broadway
