Chick: You should do it the right way, nigga. You should register that shit yo’self.
Guy: Fuck you, bitch. I’ma find somebody from my church to help me out, and that bitch gonna be suckin’ my dick in the back seat, not you.
–DMV, Staten Island
Chick: You should do it the right way, nigga. You should register that shit yo’self.
Guy: Fuck you, bitch. I’ma find somebody from my church to help me out, and that bitch gonna be suckin’ my dick in the back seat, not you.
–DMV, Staten Island
Teen boy: What kind of trains are those?
Woman: They’re called the PATH. They go to places like New Jersey, Pennsylvania and Long Island.
Teen boy: How about Staten Island?
Woman: Whatchu wanna go there for?
–M101 bus
Overheard by: Kimberly Johnson
Bemused tourist: I can't believe the Coast Guard just rescued that kid's soccer ball.
Kid running by: That's the eighth time he's done that!
–Staten Island Port
Overheard by: tastycanucks
Blonde: I hate waiting for people! It’s so boring!
Brunette: Well, what do you think I was doing for the past 40 minutes?
Blonde: Oh, wow! Sitting outside?!
–Outside I.S. 34, Staten Island
Two-year-old, pointing to Citibank: That's my bank!
–7th Ave & President St, Park Slope
Overheard by: But who's your insurance carrier?
Nine-year old boy on cell: Well, you know what? Fuck you! I'm going home! (slams cell shut and begins strutting across parking lot)
–Parking Lot, Staten Island Mall
Overheard by: WTF????
Ten-year-old girl in bathing suit to seven-year-old girl: Stop touching my ass. Whore!
–Park, Astoria
Little girl to group of little girls: Raise your hand if you're allergic to penicillin!
–R Train
Overheard by: cole
Little girl to friends, pointing at platform: That's where hobos live!
–4 Train
Overheard by: Jesus Jon
Three-year-old boy, eating hamburger: Cock cock cock cock!
–Madison Square Park
Overheard by: Alexis from Texas
Kid in cart at end of dairy aisle as man he came in with goes down aisle: Ssomeone's gonna take me! Someone's take me!
–Stop & Shop, Kingsbridge, Bronx
Overheard by: Krisztina
Teen girl: She said money don’t grow on trees but yeah it do. Money made of paper, paper made from trees.
20-something-guy: Actually, US currency is printed on cotton.
Teen boy: Cotton?
20-something-guy: Yeah, they use denim, like jeans.
Teen girl: My jeans don’t be rippin like money, they using some low grade shit.
–Staten Island Mall Bus Stop
Overheard by: ryn
Black girl #1: I'm just too black.
Black girl #2: Oh my god! You are so racist!
Black girl #3: You are just like Oprah! You be hatin' on your own self!
–Stuyvesant Place, Staten Island
Woman on cell: Oh, and by the way, I called my mother to thank her. (pause) No, I said, "Mom, I'm calling on behalf of me and the girls to thank you very much." (longer pause) Well, she can just go fuck herself then.
–90th & Amsterdam Ave
Man on cell: You know a guy really likes a girl when he takes her home to meet his mom…and you know what, Sheila? You ain't never gonna meet my mom.
–South Slope, Brooklyn
Overheard by: smfd
Female college student to friend: We really need to cougarize your mom.
–111th & Broadway
Overheard by: Oh really
Guy: So, hey, my mom didn't die today.
–W 26th & 8th
Overheard by: Katie_AK
Girl sneaking into open conductor's room in front of the train: Next stop, your mother's asshole! Stand clear of the closing cheeks!
–6 Train
Overheard by: Adriana
Handbag seller on street corner: Yo! Tell yo mama I got her bag right here!
–Times Square
Overheard by: Taryn
Girl on cell: Yeah, I'm bussin' it for now, my mom's on this thing that I have to show her responsibility… I know, it's like I get up in the morning, I haven't gotten arrested in a while, and I have a job, what more do you want from me?
–Seguine Ave & Waterbury, Staten Island
Woman: Hey! Hey! I know who started the fight! You wanna know?!
Cop: Yeah, sure.
Woman: Actually, I don’t know. Hahaha. I’m going home right now to watch porn, I don’t even care! Haha.
Cop: Wow.
–Broad and Bay, Staten Island
Overheard by: Brandi
Mother: What do you mean by “she's obsessed with him”?
Five-year-old daughter: Cause she's all like…up his butt!
–Staten Island
Overheard by: Green Star
