Guy to boyfriend: I think you're boring. I'm bored.
–W 15th & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Thompson
Woman on cell: I got so bored at work that I started talking to my mosquito bite! I told it to stop making me itch.
–58th St & 9th Ave
11-year-old boy to friends: I'm not ready for death. It's boring. All you do is fly around in the air.
–7 Train
Kid to family, looking at camels: I'm just gonna come right out and say it: 'dis is really fuckin' boring!
–Bronx Zoo
Overheard by: Tyler
Theology professor, after struggling with projection screen: This is Satan doing this to me.
–Lincoln Center, Fordham University
Crazy man with bullhorn: Hanukkah is for God, Christmas is for Satan!
–Fordham Plaza
Conductor: This is an uptown a train making all local stops. Yes, you heard right, all local stops. The e train is out of service today, as it is on a vacation to hell. Stand clear of the closing doors, please!
–A Train
Overheard by: Kirstie
Girl yelling to two friends across train: Jay-Z is like a devil worshipper. No, seriously, he's like a Freemason or whatever. They all are: him, Madonna, Britney…
–J Train
Seven-year-old tourist to mother: Are we going somewhere safe where the devil won't get me?
–34th & 28th
Child, playing with friends: Shut up, goddam it! I said shut up!
Mother: Keep your voice down, mommy has a headache.
–6BC Community Garden
Overheard by: Sara
Black six-year-old boy to Muslim six-year-old girl: Why do you wear that thing on your head?
Hispanic six-year-old girl: Oh my god! Don't you know it's, like, part of her culture?
–B Train
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Little boy: Dad, can I try to fix your watch?
Dad: Wait until we get home.
Little boy, crying: You don't trust me with anything!
Dad: No, it's not that I don't trust you, it's just that fixing a watch is very hard. Not even David Blaine can replace a tiny screw on a crowded stretch of Broadway.
Little boy: Who's David Blaine?
–Broadway & Prince
Skinny kid #1: Man, she owned me. It was crazy. There were handcuffs and blood all around. It was crazy!
Skinny kid #2: Wait… What? What are you talking about?
–Elizabeth & Houston
Overheard by: A little worried about this
Little girl: What's a credit card?
Father: That, you don't need to know.
–Wachovia ATM, Broadway & 10th St
Young child to mother: I am not psychic.
–Downtown B Train
Overheard by: furf
Normal-looking guy: But we have the complexity of magic!
–NYU
Asian Bikram instructor: Listen to your breast and find your inner piss.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Bikram Curious
Thug on cell: You don't know what kind of drugs they gave you, or if you really blacked out. But you have to understand that the spiritual world and the physical world are two different things. (pause) I don't have evidence of a spiritual world. (pause) You know that guy Des-cart? That's his name, right?
–Hunter College
Overheard by: trapped@hunter
Guy on phone: Listen, Julian, you are a shit-ass excuse for a friend. You can lick the peanut butter from between my toes. (pause) Listen, Julian, I'm on the other line with my psychic, let me call you back.
–49th St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Lara
Ghetto dad to little boy wearing knight's helmet: I don't know who the fuck's son you are, but I love you.
Little boy, muffled through helmet: I luf you do!
–3rd Ave & 9th St
Guy #1: It's too bad, 'cuz the good child actors always grow up to be terrible adult actors.
Girl #1: Not always. You have people like Drew Barrymore…
Girl #2: Or Doogie Howser.
Guy #2: Neil Patrick Harris! He has a name!
–St. John the Divine Cathedral
Overheard by: Kaitlen
