Lady suit: I can’t keep coming here to get my prescription filled. They’re beginning to recognize me.
Suit: So what?
Lady suit: So, what if I get in trouble?
Suit: Why would you get in trouble? You have a prescription from a doctor.
Lady suit: If you say so. Oh, shit, I forgot to put the date on this.
–Duane Reade, 89th & Columbus
Overheard by: Veronica at http://everythingisused.blogspot.com/
Old man, after having ticket punched: He put holes in my ticket — he ruined it! [Commuter woman laughs, thinking he’s joking.] Why are you laughing? [Commuter woman gives another nervous laugh.] Why are you laughing?!
–LIRR
Overheard by: guingel
Crazy old man: So you're telling me that the Japanese are trying to blow up the moon?!
Even crazier old man: Yes! They've been trying for years! But now they're really close!
–Costco
Overheard by: caroline
Random guy: Yeah, you know you never know who's walking next to you. Some of dis guys walk around with guns, some of dis guys have killed people. How do you know?
Bus driver: Yeah man, I mean you know if I ever make it to heaven and some of dis guys are up there wit me, I'm gonna be pissed!
–X1 Express Bus
Protester outside UN: Down with the British!
British coworker: What's with this shit?
American coworker: Apparently Britain is controlling the American government!
British coworker: Why the fuck haven't I been told?
–47th & 2nd
Overheard by: David
Officer to old lady: Hey, don't leave you bag on the floor, there are terrorist everywhere.
–45th St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: StriderNo9
Suit on cell: So you're gonna vote for a Muslim and a terrorist?
–MoMA
Hipster to friend: Yeah, terrorists totally love Bush.
–46th and 9th
Overheard by: choosing not to capitalize the B
Tourist: Are you guys terrorists?
–Rally for Gaza, 42nd & 7th
Overheard by: ooga booga
Loud black queer teen: But his best joke was like "What do you call people who hate ketchup?" (no response) "Al-Qaeda!" (bursts out laughing) Get it? It's funny because they don't have ketchup in Iraq!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Ketchup lover
Small boy zipping by on scooter: What's that word again?
Mother, following behind him: “Conspiracy.”
Small boy: Tax conspiracy!
–Prospect Heights, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Katie Naum
Seven-year old boy to bookseller: Do you have any books on crop circles in this library?
–Barnes & Noble
Overheard by: Amused bookseller a few feet away
Man to another: Don't you know? All those tunnels in Afghanistan run into the pyramids in Gaza! If I was President there would be one less pyramid.
–Soup Kitchen, Midtown
Overheard by: John Gordon
Gentleman on train: You know why they invented daylight savings, don't you? It's because of Halloween, a lot of congressmen wanted kids to have an extra hour to go trick or treating. That's why we have daylight savings.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Annie
Elderly professor: Fewer chairs, less chalk every week. It's a conspiracy!
–Pratt Institute
Overheard by: Denali
Girl on cell: I don't need anything else. I've got 20 dollars, my phone, and a condom.
–11th & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Alex
Flamboyant boy on cell: Wait, where are you? What are you doing? Please tell me you'll wear a condom. (pause, then boy's face grows increasingly horrified) Several condoms.
–Dining Hall, NYU
Street vendor next to hot dog vendor: Get your Obama condoms! They go great with a pretzel!
–Times Square
Overheard by: not another tourist
15-year-old girl: Damn, nigga, I hope you flushed the condom, cuz they be using turkey basters for other shit now. They be taking the condom from the trash can and suck up the cum and put it in theyselves. I know, cuz I messed with a few niggaz who be telling me and I learn in sex ed!
–74 Bus, Staten Island
Black lady to family in obama t-shirts: You know how all those irish people have pictures of kennedy hanging up in their living rooms? Now we can do that too!
–Whole Foods, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Definitely has a JFK picture in her apartment
Guy selling obama-themed condoms: Remember the election with every erection!
–Times Square
Overheard by: Mary Button
Black woman with a child in her stroller braiding her hair: There's gona be a lot of braidin in the white house.
–1 Train
Overheard by: Subway surfer
Woman on cell phone: Girl, if I can get to the front of the line at the vma's I can get to the front of the line at the damn inauguration. Shiiiit it's barack obama, girl!
–manhattan dental waiting room
Overheard by: Catherine
Stoned kid to a group of his friends discussing politics: You know what's scary bro? If obama gets assassinated, george bush is gonna be president again.
–1 Train @ 2AM going Downtown
Black man handing out metro: "get your obama metro! Get your obama metro! See, anyone can be president… I'm next!"
–59th Street, Lexington Ave
Overheard by: Yes we can!
