Suit to man with cat on his head: Why is there a cat on your head?
Man with cat on his head: Why isn't there a cat on your head, douchebag?
–Union Square
Suit to man with cat on his head: Why is there a cat on your head?
Man with cat on his head: Why isn't there a cat on your head, douchebag?
–Union Square
Little kid, after passenger belches: Mommy, is that man a new dinosaur species? He sounds like it.
Mom: No, he's just rude.
(subway doors open and the passenger departs)
Little kid, yelling from the door: New species! New species!
–R Line
20-something girl: So yeah, I'm finally going to the gym today.
20-something guy: I stopped going to the gym years ago. I have a Wii fit.
20-something girl: Cool. How's that working for you?
20-something guy (as if it were obvious): Oh, I don't have a tv.
–21st & Broadway
Overheard by: Alex
Professor, talking about Genesis: We covered the reason for loincloths last class.
Student #1: Wait, why was that again?
Professor: (silence)
Student #2: Adam had an erection.
Professor: Exactly. Thank you for cutting though the bullshit.
–Eugene Lang College
Overheard by: Colleen
Lawyer: And what do you sell?
Jury candidate: I used to sell diamonds. Now, in the depression…I sell toilet paper to religious people.
–Centre Street
Tween girl #1: Yeah, I was naked.
Tween guy: Why wasn't I there?
Tween girl #2: We were all taking showers together.
Tween girl #1: Yeah, I was drunk.
Tween girl #2: On champagne.
Tween girl #1: Yeah, I was raped.
Tween girl #2: Oh right, that was a fun night.
–Europa Cafe, Penn Station
Teen girl: They's your friends…
Teen boy: Is they my friends, or my friends' friends, or just some niggas I know? Get your terminology right.
–Chinese Restaurant, Brooklyn
Guy #1: So did you take her to the hospital?
Guy #2: Nah, man, I took her to Brooklyn.
–Borough Hall
Overheard by: DRC
Asian chick: I was looking for dog toys.
White chick: And how'd you get from that to vibrators?
–Dallas BBQ, Chelsea
Overheard by: Saaaandwich?
Guy: So she told me she was from New Mexico.
Blonde bimbo: New Mexico…what happened to the old Mexico?
–42nd St Shuttle
Overheard by: Chris
