Girl #1: Why is this train going so slow?
Girl #2: …There’s probably traffic.
–7 train
Overheard by: Erica
Girl #1: Why is this train going so slow?
Girl #2: …There’s probably traffic.
–7 train
Overheard by: Erica
Guy to guy friend: Did you see the Giants game last night?
Girl, interrupting: I did! I am the biggest Giants fan ever! Like, seriously.
Guy: You're wearing a Jets jersey.
Girl: Ohh, I thought it was Giants, you know, the colors sometimes get confusing.
Guy: How do you confuse red and blue with green and white?
Girl: Uhhh…
–F Train
Professor guy: What was the number one cause of death for pioneer women in the 1800s?
Chick: Beauty.
–Touro College Women’s Division, Lexington Avenue
Girl #1: Isn’t that the Princess Bride?
Girl #2: No, that’s Frankenstein.
Girl #3: That’s not Frankenstein, that’s his wife.
Girl #1: Then who’s the Princess Bride?
Girl #2: Isn’t that the one with the skeletons?
–Ray’s Pizza, St. Mark’s & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: someone who knows there were no skeletons in that one
20-something girl in full Luna Lovegood costume waiting to see Harry Potter, pointing to girl with mohawk: Jeez, their are some real weirdos in New York.
Friend, dressed as Snape: Yeah, real creeps.
–Movie Theater, Park Slope
Lady #1: Osama doesn’t have a chance to win the election.
Lady #2: Osama? Don’t you mean Barack Obama?
Lady #1: No, not him.
–5 Train
Overheard by: E-Stuff
Hipster #1: I’m really into Bossa Nova.
Hipster #2: I like her, too! What was the name of her hit song? The one that goes [starts humming]
–Yuppietown
Tourist lady: Man, there must be something going on in New York today!
Flustered man: It’s called Christmas, bitch.
–Disney Store, 5th Ave & 55th
Ghetto lady on phone waiting for bus: Ugh. I'm exhausted. I don't have the energy to stick my hands up your ass.
–Hunts Point
Dude on cell: I think he's the same guy who stuck the jar up his ass. (pause) Well, because the camera angle was the same, and the scar…
–108th & Broadway
Overheard by: Ladle
Drunk gay man speaking to straight couple: So I'm at the wedding talking to my future cousin-in-law about how it's not gay if he likes things in his ass, and he said that's not his problem, his problem is asking her to cut her fingernails.
–26th b/w 9th & 10th
Female suit on cell: There was something going into that butt, did I not mention that?
–10th & Hudson
Creepy dad, cheerfully, to seven-year-old daughter: There's only one Lindsay Lohan!
–Downtown 1 train
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Jewish girl to friend: You know how ever since I got my shnoz done people tell me I look like Amy Winehouse?
–116th St & Broadway
Crazy black guy on bus, to no one in particular: Derek Jeter looks just like Robert Deniro, man… Just like him!
–N6 Bus
Overheard by: looks like paris hilton?
Larger reporter: I'm not going to save clothes that fit me before I gained weight in case I lose it. If I lose weight, I'm going to buy some new damn clothes. I don't want to wear stuff from 1987. I'll look stupid, I'll look like Mischa Barton.
–Midtown Office
Overheard by: you wont be mischa's size
Hipster girl to friend: I mean, I really like him… But he thinks River Phoenix is a place.
–East Village
