Lesbo #1: Cocks are gross. Well, ignore the fact that I look at boy porn.
Lesbo #2: You are the weirdest lesbian I know.
–Times Square
Lesbo #1: Cocks are gross. Well, ignore the fact that I look at boy porn.
Lesbo #2: You are the weirdest lesbian I know.
–Times Square
20-something girl: That's because your girlfriend hates me!
20-something guy, slightly chuckling: She doesn't hate you… she hates everyone.
–Times Square
Overheard by: sounds like a keeper
Headline by: slowly losing faith in people
Runners-Up:
· “…But It Wouldn’t Hurt to Lose a Little Weight” – ThugAuditor
· “God, I Love Her Genocidal Tendencies” – Duncan Pflaster
· “I Told You, We Met at the Nazi Rally” – The Drifter
· “Now, If You’ll Excuse Me, I Have to Punish Myself for Saying That” – Jason
· “Or at Least Everyone I Want to Sleep With” – sagert
· “She Doesn’t Discriminate” – beans
· “She Even Hates Life Cereal” – Let’s Get Mikey
· “What I’m Really Trying to Say Is She Won’t Hate You More If We Fuck” – Zak
· “Which, OK, Technically Includes You. But Again – Threeway?” – been there
Bimbette #1: God, people in Midtown are sooo ugly.
Bimbette #2: Yeah, I know.
Bimbette #1: It’s probably because, like, 85 percent are tourists.
Bimbette #2: Oh my god, I know! Tourists are so ugly.
–Times Square
Woman on telephone, calling someone back after having the call was dropped: Sorry, we were discommunicated.
— Times Square
Thug: Why you gotta be white and ignorant?
White Girl: Why you gotta be black and belligerent?
–Times Square
Overheard by: Bacon
Seven-year-old white boy in huge afro wig, screaming: Peace out, smokers! Peace out, jazz singers! Now, who wants my autograph?
–Playground, Houston St, Soho
Little boy with broken arm: I just won eight gold medals!
–Pier 46, Hudson River Park
Overheard by: skeptical james
Three-year-old boy: The night… why does it hurt?
–Flushing Playground
Six-year-old girl waiting for parents to pay the check, chanting: Hun-ger! Hun-ger! Hun-ger!
–Chinese Restaurant, Park Slope
Overheard by: Kendra
Little boy walking towards LIRR at rush-hour: How are we going to get through all of this?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: i feel the same way
Four-year-old boy: I gotta feelin… that tonight's gonna be a good night… that tonight's gonna be a good night… that tonight's gonna be a good good night!
–Hard Rock Cafe, Times Square
Overheard by: wooohoooo
Little girl, in Cro-Magnon section of museum: Mommy, you must have known these people. They look like you!
–American Museum of Natural History
Queer: Is it wrong to think of my brother while I’m getting fucked in the ass?
Girl: Oh my god, I thought I was the only freak that thought that!
–Times Square
Overheard by: eavesdropper
Cop on cell: Yeah, Adam just called. Are there bodies there?
–Outside Times Square Police Station
Overheard by: leah
Police officer on crowd control duty: If you was special, you'd get on the sidewalk. If you was my family, you'd get on the sidewalk.
–45th & Broadway
Overheard by: Claire
Little boy to mother, after policeman walks by: Mom, it's the five-o!
–38th St, Astoria
Man: Yo, I was so twisted last night. I was in the cop car and he was like, "no drinking in the cop car!"
–Lexington & 75th
Overheard by: wb
Cop to victim: So the doors and windows were locked,no sign of forced entry…and you're sure that your panty drawer was rifled through and unknown items are missing?
–Bensonhurst
Suit: There are two kinds of people in this world: Those with MBAs from Harvard, and us.
–6th & 55th
Overheard by: Dan
Agitated suit on cell: A dime is worth less than a dime. A dime is worth less than a dime!
–Starbucks, Times Square
Overheard by: Ladle
Suit to another: People are stupid, and the ones that aren't stupid are dumb!
–Madison & 49th
Suit: So Jake had this Mustang, right? And then every time he'd go to the circus they'd treat him like shit.
–59th & Lexington
Overheard by: i'll take the mustang
Suit to sandwich maker: Give me one with extra juice, so I can let it drip down my chin.
–Deli, 33rd & 7th
Suit on cell: That's stupid! Just put it in a bag and throw it in the river!
–23rd & Lexington
Overheard by: tallnawkward
Promoter guy: Stand-up comedy! Are you interested in seeing some stand-up comedy tonight? Hey, I’m asking you a question.
Dude: Oh, no thanks.
Promoter guy: Oh, well, we also have stand-up misery.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Adam Robbins
