Seven-year-old to another, after comment: That's what she said!
Mom, yelling: Who is this girl? And why do you both always know what she said!?
–86th St & Madison
Overheard by: Luther Cherry
Seven-year-old to another, after comment: That's what she said!
Mom, yelling: Who is this girl? And why do you both always know what she said!?
–86th St & Madison
Overheard by: Luther Cherry
Sick girl: I probably don't have swine flu…but I was in Brooklyn last night.
–90th St & Lexington
Overheard by: UESider
Woman on cell: What's with this pig virus thing going around? It's killing people in Mexico, Europe, here in Queens… (pause) Do that many people eat bacon?
–55th & Madison
Overheard by: Jesus Jon
High school student, watching overheated and smoking car: What the fuck is this shit?! Dat nigga's muffler got dat swine flu!
–M86 Bus
Overheard by: Ben
Hipster guy on cell: Oh, your enthusiasm is just like the swine flu!
–22nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: BL
Amateur rapper, walking down street: If you got the swine flu, bitch, stay outta my hood! Cause the sun it is shinin' and I'm feelin' so good.
–188th St & Washington Ave
Hipster guy: Abby is a total germophobe. She was like, "what have you eaten lately?" and I was like, "a raw pig from Mexico. Is that bad?"
–76th St & 3rd Ave
Jappy highschool queen bee to Starbucks guy wearing earrings: Are those real diamonds?
Twentysomething African-American Starbucks guy: No.
Jappy highschool queen bee: Awwww I’ll mail you some real ones for your Bar Mitzvah, okay?
–Stabrucks, 78th & Lex
Tourist #1, pointing to the Met: It looks just like the Louv-rey in Paris.
Tourist #2: Oh my god, that is like the best museum.
–91st & 5th
Modern orthodox girl: … And I was like, ‘Why should I be considerate? He doesn’t even keep kosher!’
–Barnard College
Overheard by: Considerate of non-shellfish eaters and shellfish eaters alike
Guy on cell: Well, I’m only Jewish by injection…
–82nd & Madison
Overheard by: I’m only Catholic because I took a pill…
Woman: I think I’m just too Jewish for yoga.
–Park Slope
20-ish girl on cell: I mean, Jesus Christ! The Jews in the RV just won’t leave me alone!
–St. Mark’s & Ave B
Overheard by: Also accosted by the mitzvah tank
Man on cell: How did I pull off that deal? I’m a Jew, and that means I have powers over money that a dumb goyim like you can only dream of. It’s like Jewish superhero powers. Just call me ‘Super Jew.’
–Near Madison Square Garden
Overheard by: Lesbian Whisperer
Little boy: Uhhh, half New Yorkish and, uhhh, half Jewish — is that what I am, Mom? Half New Yorkish and half Jewish?
–Rockefeller Center
Overheard by: Rosie
Crackhead #1: At the time I was going to school to become a peer educator…
Crackhead #2: Uh-huh.
–103rd St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Jonesy
Stylish girl #1: Devorah Rose now claims she was mugged at gunpoint. What some people will do for fame! Gross!
Stylish girl #2: Yeah, I heard that they stole her penis.
–Upper East Side
Bag lady: Hey, can I bum a smoke?
Hipster guy: I bummed this one.
Bag lady: Ching-chong, ching-ching-ching-ching-chong!
She enters CVS and comes back.
Bag lady: Ching-chong, ching-chong.
Hipster guy: You’re a fat ugly bitch.
Bag lady: You’re a chink.
Hipster guy: Why don’t you say that to my face?
Bag lady: I will. My boyfriend will kick your ass!
Hipster guy: Why do you have to start with me right now?
Bag lady: Because you’re a chink. You’re Chinese, right?
Hipster guy: No.
Bag lady: Japanese?
Hipster guy: No.
Bag lady: Umm…Korean?
Hipster guy: No.
Bag lady: Asian?
–86th & 2nd
Overheard by: Nakul Patel
Woman: He’s so horny he’d fuck a venetian blind.
–Starbucks, UES
Man in elevator on cell: Yeah. That's what I'm paying for, right? Next time just make sure it's a male to female.
–Elevator, Chelsea
Staten Island man to son: Okay, you have to be careful here. And don't touch any of the pretty ladies: the prettier they are, the more likely it's a man.
–1st & Houston
Middle aged woman to friend: Every morning I wake up and think I look more and more like Mrs Doubtfire.
–Union Square
Overheard by: mk
Guy in pink spandex to Victorian Gardens employee: Excuse me, where do the trannies hang out?
–Central Park
Preppy chick to friends: Did I ever tell you guys about the tranny I slept with?
–19th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Well-Dressed Indian Boy
Mom, in motherly voice, to crying four-year-old: Aww, what's the matter, did the little transvestite scare you?
–2nd & 72nd
Overheard by: Nancy
