Guy: My mom hit my dad with a frying pan. He doesn't have a cheek anymore. It's been entirely restructured. She used to beat the shit out of him! It was so funny. But when he drunk–that's when she'd get a beating.
Girl, sympathetically: Your family…
Guy: Oh, I love my family! I don't know what I'd do without them!
Neptune City, New Jersey
Mom: Now think very hard, honey. Use your noggin.
Son, after long pause: I think my noggin is empty.
Ohio
Girl: Everyone knows Barbie is disproportional. Look! She has no butt! And her waist is tiny.
[Pause.]Professor: I bet black Barbie has a big butt.
Los Angeles, California
Lady to friend: I don't care that it's a squash, it's still inappropriate… legs spread everywhere.
Farmers' Market
Oregon
Overheard by: Shea
Male student to girlfriend: Your body is uneven!
George Mason University
Fairfax County, Virginia
Prissy girl on phone: You have a stupid face. You have to be my friend.
Cardiff
Wales
Overheard by: Gordinho
Boyfriend: But baby, I don’t want bloody arms!
Girlfriend: Then talk to me about my feet!
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Girl #1: My uterus! Oh god, my uterus!
Girl #2: My god, the raptor is going into my uterus.
Dining Commons, UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Beth
Out-patient guy: I am totally embracing this program with both feet first.
Rehab
Parsippany, New Jersey
Overheard by: Mary Beth
Mother to little boy: Stop that! You're gonna hurt your scrotum!
Boston, Massachusetts
