Do Girls Ever Wednesday One-Liner?

Hobo to passer-by: Arrrr! I'm a fart knocker!

–7th Ave & 25th St

Bimbette: Wow! I ate olives today and I didn't fart!

–L Train

Girl to friend: She farts makeup! She's so glamorous!

–Deli

Overheard by: Straining to hear the rest of the conversation…

30-something tall woman to friend: I used to live in three houses. Now I live in a closet. It's so small that I have to hang my parakeet out the window just to take a fart!

–Ave B & 3rd St

Overheard by: Mike

Older Greek lady to friend: I don't know Celia. I think it is better for everyone if I have gas.

–Astoria

Overheard by: David

Posted on November 30, 2014
All Wednesday One-Liners, Alphabet City, Astoria, Bimbettes, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Compare/Contrast, Compliments, Delis, Farting & Burping, Food, Foreigners, Friends, Girls, Hobos, Home, Sweet Home, Old People, On the Subway, Strangers, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Women

Wouldn't They Want It for a Golf Course?

Crazy old man: So you're telling me that the Japanese are trying to blow up the moon?!
Even crazier old man: Yes! They've been trying for years! But now they're really close!

–Costco

Overheard by: caroline

Posted on November 29, 2014
Crazies, Foreigners, Old People, Paranoia, Store, Weirdness

Exhibitionism Is Extra

Woman: What hotel are you staying at?
German tourist: I’m not staying at a hotel. I’m staying at a hostel.
Woman: We’re gonna do it in a hostel?

–Time Warner Center

Posted on November 27, 2014
Bimbettes, Buildings, Foreigners, Home, Sweet Home, Sex, Stupidity, Tourism, Tourists, Travel, Women

I Mean, Since the Invention of the Elevator

Brown guy: That nigga act like he never seen a Sherpa before! Ignorant.
White guy: Well, he probably hasn’t. You aren’t that common, you know.

–Greene & Grand

Overheard by: lil pirate

Posted on November 19, 2014
Comebacks, Foreigners, Insults, Stupidity, The Village, White People

That’s What They’re Calling Anal Now

Girl #1: I love a little ethnicity…in the penis!
Girl #2: Totally, I heart the foreigners. The best I’ve ever had was a Frenchie.
Drunk guy: What? Hold on. You fucked a scrunchie?

–Houston & A

Posted on November 17, 2014
Bimbettes, Drunks, Foreigners, Girls, Global Geography, Multiculturalism, Overheard Style, Penis, Sex & Relationships, Union Square and East Village, Wishes & desires, Words

I Don’t Think This is What Rosa Parks Meant

An Asian woman is talking loudly on her cell phone

Fat Black lady: You need to move to the back of the damn bus. We don’t wanna hear that ching-chang ching-chong bullshit!

–Q34 bus

Overheard by: Lauren

Posted on November 16, 2014
Advice, Anger Management, Asians, Black People, Etiquette, Fat People, Foreigners, Ghetto Chicks, Languages, On the Bus, Only in New York, Public Transportation, Race, Women

It’s Like English, But Cooler

Student #1: How long have you been here?
Student #2: I live here for four years.
Student #1: Your English is perfect! What is your native language?
Student #2: I speak Thai. Your English is fine, too. You are from Trinadad, right? What is your native language?
Student #1: English.

–FIT library

Posted on November 4, 2014
Compliments, Foreigners, Global Geography, Languages, Library, Students, Stupidity

Don't Act Like You Don't Know What I Mean– I've Seen Your Apartment

Russian woman w/heavy accent: So you know it was arranged–like arranged marriage–and I marry him for dowry.
Friend, in disbelief: My goodness! For what? Like cows?
Russian woman: What cows? We live in the city! For money, I marry him for money.

–23rd St & Park Ave

Overheard by:

Posted on November 3, 2014
Animals & Nature, Compare/Contrast, Foreigners, Friends, Marriage, Money & Class, Murray Hill and Gramercy, Women

…You Dutchbag.

Black guy: And lemme get two Dutches…
Store clerk: (puts them on the counter)
Black guy: And lemme also get that … that female Dutch.
Store clerk: (looks confused)
Black guy: You know, man, that female Dutch. You know what I'm talkin bout, man.
Store clerk, pointing to various items: This one? This one?
Black guy: Nah, man, you know, that female Dutch! For the pussy, man! For the pussy!
Store clerk: (takes down a douche) This one?
Black guy: Yeah, yeah! See? You knew what I was talkin bout!

–130th St & Lenox Ave

Overheard by: Kosi

Posted on October 27, 2014
Black People, Clerks, Foreigners, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Offers and requests, Shopping, Store, Vagina

Foreigners