Girl #1: Oh my gosh, this is so cool.
Girl #2: I know. [Smiles.]Girl #1: Thanks for bringing me here, I love you. I am so glad I became a lesbian, if I wasn’t I wouldn’t have met you!
Girl #2: Aww, thanks. Do you want to go to my apartment now?
Girl #1: Yes! Let’s go. Are we going to have fun like we did last night?
Girl #2: Even more, baby.
–M&M Store, Times Square
Hipster Girl #1: So you guys should come. Oh! You should bring your boyfriend, I haven’t met him yet.
Hipster Girl #2: I wish I could but it’s on Wednesday night, right? He’s really into fashion, that’s when he watches Project Runway.
[Hipster Girl #1 stares blankly at Hipster Girl #2 for a few moments.]Hipster Girl #1: Oh.
–Central Park
Overheard by: hobojane
Boyfriend: Don’t be mad.
Girlfriend: Don’t be gay.
–Union Square Park
Guy: So, I saw this video online of a chick who tied her beef curtains in a knot…
–Astor Pl
Chick: Maybe I should scrap my dissertation and just write erotica?
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Wild Dog Boy
Chick: My favorite porn line, and possibly my favorite movie line ever, is, ‘Suck it, my queen. Suck it.’
–Grand Sichuan, St. Mark’s Pl
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Intern to another: They do too make gay pornography!
–42nd & Madison
Overheard by: Nicolas Agrait
Cube neighbor on phone with friend: So, the first thing she needs to do is throw it out — get rid of all the porn. I mean, she has closets and closets full of it!
–Midtown
20-something woman on cell: I may be too analytical for erotica.
–Outside Century 21
Overheard by: McFreaky
Tourist girl: Oh my god, did you see them? Did you see the lesbians?
Bored guy friend: Yes.
Tourist girl: That was so cool!
–1st & York
Overheard by: Not quite as excited
Straight girl #1: Go find me a cute boy!
Straight girl #2: Ok! I will… But he’s not going to be into you.
–Pride parade route
30-something guy: Don't tell me you have a boyfriend, I know that's not true.
20-something girl: Actually, I wasn't going to say that. I was going to say “I don't do dick.” But cool, have a nice day! (smiles and leaves)
–Grand Central Shuttle
Girl #1, smoking: She was such a lesbian. She made vegetable lasagna. Vegetable lasagna!
Girl #2, in disbelief: Wait–so her culinary choices dictate her sexuality?
Girl #1: Well, then she fingered me.
–Zombie Hut, Smith St
Overheard by: double d
Guy #1: Wow, they indicted five cops in that beating last year in Shenandoah.
Guy #2: Yeah, it was a hate crime.
Guy #1: The victim was gay?
Guy #2: No, dude, he was Mexican.
Guy #1: What? Since when is it a crime to be Mexican?
Guy #2, after pause: Everyone on this train thinks you are a fucking idiot, and I agree with them.
–Uptown 6 Train
Hipster waitress to another: Camel toe is like, really hot, but also really uncomfortable.
–Williamsburg
College guy to friend: Dude, I'd definitely date a dude who looked like a hot chick… It's not gay.
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Stephen
Professor: Welcome to CUNY, it's like menopause. It's either too hot or too cold.
–City University of New York
Latino girl on cell: Bitch, please. I'm gonna look mad hot tonight. I'ma comb my hair!
–American Apparel
Male professor: I don't care how hot Brad Pitt is… If he sits on my lap, nothing's going to happen!
–New York Institute of Technology
Overheard by: Not Brad Pitt
