Teens

Drunk Hispanic teen: How do I get to Times Square?
Older white lady: I am not sure… Maybe two stops. [Teen whispers to her.] Good Lord, no! I am old enough to be your mother!

–F train, 57th St

Black teen hipster #1: Why are there so many white people on the 2 train this late at night?
Black teen hipster #2: Please. All these white people are getting off at 96th Street.

Train stops at 96th. The white people leave the train.

Black Teen Hipster #2: Watch ’em all scamper away!

–2 train

Teen girl #1: I don’t care, I’ll talk booty all night for $50. Works for me.

–Keyspan Park

Overheard by: birdw0rks

Teen #1 (after looking up at advert for Sex and the City): Dude, Sarah Jessica Parker is like, so freakin hot!
Teen #2: She's older than your fucking mother!
Teen #1: Which like, so totally backs up my point.

–7th St

Overheard by: Joel Moore

Teen tourist: How much for the sunglasses?
Vendor: Thirty dollars.
Teen tourist: In Chinatown?!

–Chinatown

Overheard by: Ozzy

White teenage boy to black teenage boy: She thinks I am a rapist or something.
(black teenage boy giggles) Which I am cool with, you know what I mean?

–Bay Ridge Ave & 4th Ave

Brunette Guido girl: Ohmigosh, you would love this girl, she's like, the only cool blonde person. This one time she was just like "Dude, can we just do the peace-and-love thing? Cause, I don't know how to fight."

–LIRR

Overheard by: whaaasgood

Fashion intern: I had swine flu last year, before it was cool.

–Cafeteria, Hearst Tower

Overheard by: interns are our future

Bike rider on phone, walking with girlfriend: I don't have his number, but you can call Tom* and go down there. Those guys are pretty cool. You can just go down there and give them a prostate massage.

–Riverside Park

Crazy man dressed like a King: Everyone, I just bought the sun! So if you don't mind, I'd like a hundred dollars an hour if you're using my sunlight.

–Sheep Meadow, Central Park

MTA track worker to another: Why does everybody wanna die tonight, Eric? Is there a full moon or something?

–49th St Station

Overheard by: Jon A.

Man talking to himself on imaginary cellphone: There will never be peace until the planet explodes. Then there will be peace. (pause) Yes, I took my medication today.

–R Train

Overheard by: Matt Giella

Guy in line for a play: I don't take my sunglasses off because the sun never sets on a badass

–41st & 7th

Overheard by: clara

Teen thug to another: He said he likes sunsets. Who says he likes sunsets?

–Macon & Marcy, Brooklyn

Overheard by: g

Co-ed: And Galileo's like, "Saturn has rings!" And Kepler's like, "Oh my god, really?" And Galileo's like, "Ya, really!"

–1 Train

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Guard: Your key card doesn't work.
Teenager: It's because I'm black.

–Columbia University

Teenage daughter to mother, in front of Ashley Stewart: How about there? I'm sure they have some cute dresses.
Mother: Ashley Stewart is for fat people, honey. (points to three plus-size women entering store)

–Kings Plaza

Teenage girl #1: I heard something really awkward today, want to hear it?
Teenage girl #2: Okay.
Teenage girl #1: I heard that when you sneeze, you have one-eighth of an orgasm.
Teenage girl #2: Orgasms must be terrible.

–6th Ave

Overheard by: Sunny