Boy: Look mommy, it's a doggy, it's going to say “ruff!”
(dog stares at boy)
Boy: Oh… It's not a ruff doggy…
Mom: No, honey, it's a sweet doggy.
Boy (wide eyed): It can say “sweet?”
–Washington Mews & University
Overheard by: Tyler
Boy: Look mommy, it's a doggy, it's going to say “ruff!”
(dog stares at boy)
Boy: Oh… It's not a ruff doggy…
Mom: No, honey, it's a sweet doggy.
Boy (wide eyed): It can say “sweet?”
–Washington Mews & University
Overheard by: Tyler
Girl: He gets it up, but he can’t keep it up. He doesn’t understand he’s dating a Puerto Rican, he needs to keep it hard.
Guy: He’s Irish. You have to understand he has to drink.
Girl: Actually when he drinks, it’s better. His sex drive improves.
–The Village Tavern, Bedford Street
Hip gay teen girl #1: But she doesn't like fantasy!
Hot gay teen girl: Well, I don't like fantasy either, like I don't like Dungeons and Dragons, or dinosaurs, or anything.
Hip gay teen girl #2: But…dinosaurs were real.
–NYU Dorm
Overheard by: Samwell
Guy: So how come you were late today?
Girl: I really had to take a dump, otherwise my downward-facing dog was gonna be a non-housebroken one.
–Broadway & Houston
Overheard by: Daniel Motta
NYU chick #1: It’s like making out with a girl.
NYU chick #2: No, it’s like waking up in Tijuana with three Mexican boyfriends.
–Bleecker St & Macdougal St
Overheard by: Candi
Jersey teen on class trip: I wonder if they've got Billy Joel here.
Friend: Dude, isn't he some preacher in Texas?
–Rock N' Roll Hall of Fame Annex, Mercer St
Overheard by: stillrockn'rolltome
NYU girl #1: What the hell is the professor talking about? We can't use the internet to do research?
NYU girl #2: She doesn't know what she's talking about.
NYU girl #1: I mean, an article in The New York Times is totally an academic resource, even if I look at it on their web page. Does she think The New York Times isn't right?
NYU girl #2: Yeah, fuck her!
NYU girl #1: I also cited the bible in my paper, but that's totally an academic source.
–Waverly Place
Guy looking at books, to no one in particular: I don’t want to hear or see anything about the devil, demons, voodoo or big hairy black guys.
–Barnes & Noble
Overheard by: 153
Guy hawking pamphlets: How to sucker punch the devil right in the ass!
–W 12th & Brodway
Overheard by: Why didn’t I get that pamphlet?!
Coworker about colleague: Every time he comes by here the number 666 comes up.
–1250 Broadway
Punk kid, walking past a group of nuns: Hail Satan!
–Waverly & Greene
Professor: I don’t want to be saved, I want to go to hell. I’ll meet interesting people there!
–Cooper Union, Astor Place
Overheard by: Hopefully not me!
Crazy older lady screaming on cell: You what? You are buying soda? You are going to go to fucking hell! Don’t you remember the promise you made to god? You’re probably standing in line with some goddamn candy too. You are going to hell!
–W Train
Overheard by: DR G LUV
Little boy: When will it be Hanukkah?
Dad: Not for a while.
Little boy: But I'm begging you for Hanukkah.
Dad: You got some time until it's Hanukkah, buddy.
Little boy: Now you'll never get me a present!
Dad: (begins to leave with the little boy)
Little boy: I am not moving until it's Hanukkah!
–Bagel Shop, The Village
Overheard by: wilpon
Girl: Ah! there’s a cockroach under the table.
Guy: Where are you going?
Girl: Leaving. I’ll be outside. Just pay the tab.
Guy: Okay.
Waiter: …Hey, where’d your date go?
Guy: She saw a cockroch and bolted.
Waiter: Yeah, we get that a lot.
–Patsy’s Pizza, University Place
Overheard by: Luke
