Young guy: Oh, whatever, we all know you have short, stubby legs.
Young woman: That's not what you say when they're around your neck.
–Citrus Bar & Grill
Young guy: Oh, whatever, we all know you have short, stubby legs.
Young woman: That's not what you say when they're around your neck.
–Citrus Bar & Grill
Guy on cell: In a wig, with his pants down, watching her from his car.
–33rd St, Astoria
Overheard by: Ferna
Teen to another: Barack Obama said, "pull your pants up!"
–Broadway & 72nd St
NYU girl: I wanna do it, and I wanna do it in my pants box.
–Weinstein Hall, NYU
Border's employee to man sleeping in chair: Sir, could you please wake up? …and also zip up your pants.
–Borders
Guy on phone: Well, I guess I thought you might be kind of gay after you invited me to that "no pants" party.
–Astoria
Girl: Why do you like her so much?
Guy: She's just so weird-looking!
–NYU
Dude, in front of closed Staples: Staples doesn't open until fucking noon? What are we, in a goddamn small town? Noon? Am I supposed to be in fucking church right now? God!
–Meeker St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Simon
Girl on cell: Because I don't function in the world of time so well.
–7th Ave b/w 27th & 28th St
Overheard by: John C
Pilot on PA: JetBlue welcomes you to New York City, where the local time is 1:40… 1:45… Kinda… I think.
–JFK
Law student to another: What time is it in the real world?
–Fordham Law School
Drunk girl: Do you skateboard?
Random guy: Yeah.
Drunk girl: Do you own a skateboard?
Random guy: Yeah.
Drunk girl: Do you wanna have sex on your skateboard?
–4th & Ave C
Overheard by: Shani
Guy: Let’s see…I’ve got a dollar, and a pubic hair.
–49th & 8th
Guy #1: Why do you have Stacey's number under “dude-bro”?
Guy #2: Uhm…because she looks like a dude, bro.
–14th St
Overheard by: That's unfortunate
Ghetto chick to friend: Remember when you took that chinchilla from me, back in the day?
–Q Train
Overheard by: Chloe
Grungy dude on cell: So I jumped on my horse and got the fuck outta there.
–14th & 6th
Overheard by: bildita
Guy: …and those Egyptians had crocodiles. Those crocodiles that shoot lasers out of their eyes.
–Metropolitian Musuem of Art
Overheard by: Bonkers in Yonkers
Hipster chick: Deer antlers. Everywhere I go, all I see are deer antlers. I’m getting sick of it.
–14th St & 1st Av
Overheard by: Larry
Thug: I’m like super pimp. I pimp men and women… And cats and dogs. Shit, I got the whole animal kingdom.
–10th & Broadway
Composed chick on cell: He’s a giraffe, and I’m a leopard, and I’m never gonna be a giraffe. I’ve tried and tried, but my destiny is as a leopard, you see? I can fake being a giraffe for awhile, but eventually I’m gonna have to rip his throat out and feed on his entrails. It’s in my nature. The only alternative is divorce.
–Billiard Hall, Elizabeth & Bowery
Girl: God, it’s getting so cold! I should’ve brought my winter coat!
Guy: You don’t need a coat, you need a hot man to warm you up.
Girl: I need that, too…but I’d start with a coat.
–Carroll Gardens
Overheard by: Mallory McMahon
Guy: Snookie is not even Italian. She is Chilean.
Girl: Snookie is a creature of her own. I don't know what she is… She likes pickles.
–7th & 1st
Overheard by: R
