Jewish girl #1: I got an ultrasound last week.
Jewish girl #2: I had an ultrasound once. I got to see my ovaries.
Jewish girl #1: How did they look?
Jewish girl #2: Really cute!
–F Train
Overheard by: forgotmyipod
Jewish girl #1: I got an ultrasound last week.
Jewish girl #2: I had an ultrasound once. I got to see my ovaries.
Jewish girl #1: How did they look?
Jewish girl #2: Really cute!
–F Train
Overheard by: forgotmyipod
Husky unshaved guy to younger girlfriend: You mean you never saw Animal House? You're not human!
–Lower West Side
Thug to another: Jabba the Hutt? That's like some Tony Soprano shit, nigga. And the spices? That's drugs. Star Wars drugs!
–13th St & University
Overheard by: Jaimie
Girl to friends: My English teacher said Precious is "whack."
–City Cinemas, E 86th St
Stuffy Bulgarian professor: Do you guys know the film Soul Plane? It's very funny, right?
–NYU
Overheard by: really glad I got up before 9:30 for this
Girl on cell: Yeah, after that movie, I'm gonna think all adopted kids are evil dwarfs with a hormone imbalance.
–Columbus Circle
Tiny, incredibly old woman: And all that stuff about Sadie having a good heart?
Tiny, incredibly old man: Yeah.
Tiny, incredibly old woman: What a cold bitch.
–Squires Diner, Cliff St.
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Drunk guy: Excuse me, Miss, I’m askin’… I want to kiss your ass! Just the left cheek!
–8th Ave & W 55th St
Overheard by: Fred Daubert
Canadian guy: The first kiss’ll be at the altar.
–Uptown 6 train
Loudmouth on cell: Yeah man, and then, like, I was kissing her, and then I like, just started dancing with her. We were dancing, man. And then I picked her up, and she beat the crap out of me, and I had to put her down. Yeah, man. But she was a fuckin’ awesome kisser.
–NYU
Overheard by: lucy in the sky with diamonds
Girl on cell: I can’t remember the last time we kissed on the mouth, can you?
–43rd & Lex
Ghetto chick leaving after fight with boyfriend: Kiss my ass. No, kiss my pussy while it’s bleeding, like you used to.
–Washington Heights
Girl on cell: He said he wouldn’t leave until I kissed him… so I kissed him while I was on the toilet!
–115th St & Manhattan Ave
Overheard by: Melissa Berry
Guy #1: I mean, if it's a noose, it's better to have a drop than just hang there.
Guy #2: Yeah, no way, man.
Guy #1: On the other hand, if it's a meat hook, a drop would do some serious internal damage.
–W 35th & 9th
Girl: So are you still upset about her?
Guy: No, it’s okay, her breath smells funny…like poop.
Girl: I had a swim coach like that. So does her breath really smell like poop?
Guy: Did you have to say it that loud?
–New York Public Library, 40th & 5th
Overheard by: Andrew Marsh
Old Woman: Oh, I just feel so gassy. I’ve got so much gas.
–Public Library, Bensonhurst
Businesswoman: Even though they smoked like chimneys and drank like fish, whatever, the south of France and Italy used to be much healthier than us.
–Midtown office
Two young boys: Take our picture! Take our picture!
Woman: Maybe if you’re good and take a bath together later I’ll take a picture of you in the bath.
–Central Park
Overheard by: ben-head
Girl: Yeah, like I mean, I would definitely say that I was in the best shape of my life when I had my eating disorder.
Guy, after long pause: Uhhhhh… at least you're honest!
–Fordham University
Overheard by: Rachel
