Guy with thick accent: Where you get off to the Walton Center?
NY chick: The what?
Guy with thick accent: The Walton Center.
NY chick: Do you know what street it's on?
Guy with thick accent: No, no. You know, the Walton Center.
NY chick: I'm sorry, I don't know where that is.
Guy with thick accent: The Walton Center! The buildings, they fall, they fall!
NY chick: You mean the World Trade Center?
Guy with thick accent: Yes!
NY chick: Fulton Street and fuck you.
–Uptown 5 Train
Crazy Asian bag lady: My pasta! Who took my pasta!? You! (points to yuppie guy) You took it!
Yuppie guy: Lady, does it look like I need your pasta?
Crazy Asian bag lady: Calm down, asshole, it's just pasta. I think I told David he could have it.
–W 52nd
NYU girl #1: I am so fucking sick of the Jews for Jesus everywhere.
NYU girl #2: Yeah, I know, it’s really annoying.
NYU girl #1: It’s not annoying; it’s fucking insulting! What, do I look Jewish to them? I mean, seriously, I don’t, do I? You’d tell me if I looked Jewish, right?
–Washington Sq Park
Overheard by: Emily
Comedy promoter guy: Gentlemen, are you interested in seeing some comedy?
Guy: I’ve already seen your shitty show!
–78th & Broadway
After the woman sent them to the wrong place twice, my uncle went back to the information desk.
Uncle: Excuse me, but did you have to pass an IQ test to get this job?
Information lady: I’m wearing my eyeglasses.
–JFK
Boy #1: Suck my dick!
Boy #2: Fuck you!
Boy #1: Suck my dick! I had sex with your mother (long pause) she had… a little baby!
–Graham Ave & Ainslie St, Williamsburg
Man: Fuck you.
Woman: Fuck you.
Man: Fuck you.
Woman: Fuck you.
Six-year-old girl: Cunt.
–Grand Central
Teenage boy, yelling at his iPod: Damn it, damn it, dammit! Damn stupid thing. Dammit!
Old lady passing by: You should be ashamed of yourself. Do you talk like that in front of your mother?
Teenage boy: Don't blame me, blame Jack Bauer. Damn it.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Haley
Jewish girl: She signs up for JDate, goes out to dinner, and is engaged in four months. I sign up for JDate, and I go out to dinner with a duck. What the hell!
–Astoria
Suit on cell: That's what you get when you start dating at age 18 while volunteering in a Croatian refugee camp.
–M66 Bus
Female 30-something suit: Why would you think I don't have taste in men just because I'd do a guy with a hook, or a guy in a wheelchair?
–31st & Crescent, Astoria
Loud woman on cell: It's called "communication," Larry! Communication! You are such an idiot!
–3rd Ave b/w 40th & 41st
Overheard by: Tom
College guy to friend: I don't understand it, man. Every time I go out with this girl, like her vagina is showing.
–8th St & University
Man on cell: 26 years? Damn! After 26 days, I'd be all like, "bitch, I love you and all, but the next word that comes outta yo mouth, I'm gonna have to bash yo head in with a frying pan. I'm sicka hearin' the sound of yo voice!" No, of course I don' mean that, baby.
–JFK Airport
Overheard by: Riot
Man walking dog: Yo, take a shit right here.
–Houston & Mangin
Overheard by: How about a little to the left?
Woman to her gang-banging pug dog: Everyone can have love together!
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: riana
Man to Yorkie, tugging at leash outside porn shop: You don’t want to go in there. Nothing you could use in there… Hmmm, except maybe the rubber goods.
–28th & 8th
Overheard by: Chuckell
Upset man to black lab walking sheepishly beside him: They didn’t want you in there because you’re black, and they should have the guts to say so! We should go back to that fucking place and burn it down! [Pats pooch on head.] Good girl. You’re a good girl. [They start walking away again, and man mutters to himself] Motherfuckers.
–W 4th St
