Woman: And you know what’s worse?
Man: What?
Woman: All the demons are male. Always. I mean, how unfair is that? It’s fucking retarded.
–B75 bus
Woman: And you know what’s worse?
Man: What?
Woman: All the demons are male. Always. I mean, how unfair is that? It’s fucking retarded.
–B75 bus
50-something guy #1: That food was so good last night.
50-something guy #2: I think we were just drunk.
50-something guy #1: No, that was a great grilled cheese… Remember the Russian hooker with the whip?
50-something guy #2: Yeah… Here’s 14th Street.
–A train
Overheard by: Steph
Man: They’re the only animal that loves you!
Woman: Well, I don’t know about the only animal…
Man: Well, ravens. Ravens love you, too.
–Au Bon Pain, Port Authority
Overheard by: not minding my own business
Young woman: Hey, would you like to sign up and register to vote?
Man: No, thanks. I’m an illegal alien.
–Grand Concourse, the Bronx
Overheard by: BobbyD
Guy soliciting money: Just one penny. Just one penny to help the homeless.
Contributor: Where’s Eddie?
Guy soliciting money: Eddie? Oh, he’s on vacation this week.
–Outside Barnes and Noble, Union Square
Overheard by: Bob who gives at the office
Man: I’ll give you 10 bucks if you can tell me what baseball team is popular in Philly.
Woman: Duh, it’s the Red Sox! …What? Boston is in Philly.
Man: Sweetie, Boston isn’t in Philly.
Woman: Don’t lie to me, you know how easy I fall for things!
Man: But Boston is in Massachusetts.
Woman: That’s what I said!
–E 23rd St & Lex
Overheard by: Lisa
Chick complaining about looking for roommates: The problem with today is that everybody’s Jewish.
–Dobbin & Norman
Overheard by: Sam Tresler
Young quasi-gangster to friends: Even if you’re not Jewish, you’re, like… Jewish.
–Post-Yankees game on B train
Overheard by: Indiana
Tourist chick: How, how, how can there be no Jewish deli? All I want is a tongue sandwich and a fucking piece of pizza!
–Grand Central Station
Overheard by: X-tal
Lady suit: Are you saying you’d rather be with a Jewish person than a wife-beater?
–18th & 6th
Overheard by: emily
JAP: Shiksas are totally not allowed on Jdate!
–71st & Columbus
Overheard by: DebDan
Chick in stall to friend: It must be a Jewish thing, but whenever there’s food around I have to eat it — even if I’m not hungry.
–Restroom, Loews Cinema, 11th & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Em
Queer: No, like, of course you’re not Jewish. I just wanted to check before I dissed the Jews.
–113th & Broadway
Overheard by: hilla
Man, while snatching last seat on train: Sorry lady, I got a broken foot.
Lady: So? I’ve got a broken heart.
–Uptown 6 train
Man #1: Why is it so hard to get it passed, anyway?
Man #2: That’s the law in the United States, man. It’s been that way for thousands of years.
–Outside bar by Penn Station
Overheard by: craig
Man: Excuse me, I noticed you were looking at the Times. Here, you can have mine. I don’t think I’ll get around to reading it today.
Woman, hugging man lovingly: Thank you.
–Astor Place station
Overheard by: reggae
