Guy in bar: My ex-girlfriend from college is now on that reality show Rock of Love 2.
Group of friends: Wow, really?
Guy in bar: Yeah… I'm the reason she told Brett Michaels that she never had “all the way” sex.
–4th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: BenRC
Guy in bar: My ex-girlfriend from college is now on that reality show Rock of Love 2.
Group of friends: Wow, really?
Guy in bar: Yeah… I'm the reason she told Brett Michaels that she never had “all the way” sex.
–4th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: BenRC
Girl: Lisa went down on me while I was on my period. I decided just to roll with it.
–Frying Pan Bar
Professor: Let's all go home and menstruate! My goal in this class is to get all of you on the same schedule.
–NYU
Overheard by: Leslie
Upscale female suit on cell: I'm totally on the rag, but you can still lick my asshole.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: The Trooper
Gay guy on cell: I'm so cranky, I feel like I'm a girl who's on her period and pregnant.
–Park Ave & 29th St
Big black guy, loudly on phone: Why you bitchin at me because I won't cleeeeen behind you? I'm not gonna clean your nasty period ass offa the toilet! (nearby people begin laughing) Bitch, even the people on the streets be laughing at you!
–123rd St & Manhattan Ave
Tween to mom: But mooooooommmmmmm, I don't want to go to that school.
Mom to tween: Chris Rock's kids go there.
–Upper West Side
Overheard by: Cathy Borck
Guy on cell: There's a lot bruacracy in public social work…
–Eastern Parkway & New York Ave
Overheard by: jeff
Woman on phone: Her mother is a bird. Her whole family is a flock of birds. I cannot even say how ghetto she is. She said, "columinate." I said, what? You mean "a-coom-a-late?
–1 Train
Preppy on cell: What's your next class? Professional rioting?
–Fordham
Girl: This class is skewered. There are only three guys and like twenty girls. Damn!
–Brooklyn College
Overheard by: Phil
Guy to girl on train: She's just like "huh, brutha." It's like, embedded in them. They were breaded that way.
–7 Train
30-something woman on phone: Ma! Jesus, ma. I totally agree with you. (pause) Yeah, he told me to come over when the house was done. (pause) Yeah, fixed up. Jesus, ma. (groan) Yes. No! I'm not a slut. Ma!
–Jackson Heights
Overheard by: maria
Teen girl to friend: I was living with my grandmother and my girlfriend was studying social work, I was sleeping with men at this time–but I wasn't a slut or anything.
–Westside Tavern, 23rd & 8th
Girl on cell: How many guys did I sleep with? Thirty, forty?
–Pearl St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: CAC Baby from The Glebe
Father on phone with daughter: I didn't raise you to be a fucking whore. If I wanted you to be a whore you think I would've paid for your goddamn degree?
–Washington Square Park
High school freshman to friend: My Spanish teacher called me a slut!
–61st St & Amsterdam Ave
Hot female student #1: I'm sending out goooood vibes for my calc exam.
Hot female student #2: Dude, the universe totally doesn't care about your calc exam.
Hot female student #1: What?
Hot female student #2: It cares about kittens! The universe cares about kittens! Jesus!
–Bedford Ave & Campus Ave
Wide-eyed woman on cell: Is it the drugs that are doing this to me?
–St Mark's & Ave A
Guy going superfast on a bike with eyes closed and feet on handlebars: Oh, man, I'm trippin'! Oh, god, I'm shroomin'!
–Delancey St
Professor: Take that Ritalin-Scotch-heroin cocktail… With a pop-tart!
–Pratt Institute
Overheard by: Denali
Flyer guy: Anyone want to help support my drug habit?
–Times Square
Girl with group of friends: You can be a responsible drug addict… I had two jobs and went to college.
–Jane & 4th St
Overheard by: M Tod
Barnard girl: So my grandparents gave me one of those Visa gift card things for $50 for Valentine's Day… What the fuck am I going to spend $50 on, if it's not drugs?
–The Diana Center, Barnard College
Stephen Colbert, after flubbing a line during filming: I'm high. (audience laughs) Don't blog that!
–Colbert Report Studios, 54th St
Overheard by: Allison
Suit-in-training #1: Yeah, you go there and they just have you sign saying you took the class and give you the certificate, all done.
Suit-in-training #2: What's the class about?
Suit-in-training #1: Ethics, and all that bullshit stuff.
–R Train
Overheard by: Hal Shaw
Student #1: Dyking it out with Kayla is my alibi.
Student #2: I thought it was “blowing the professor.”
Student #1: No, that's only if the first alibi fails.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Someone
Girl #1: I have a 19.5% rate on my credit card, I don't know what that means.
Girl #2: I thought students didn't need to pay any interest.
–6 Train
Overheard by: DanInTheCity
