Ghetto princess #1: So I said, “No way, Ay-rab, I'm not dancing with you.”
Ghetto princess #2: He wasn't Arab, he was Greek.
Ghetto princess #1: He looked like he was from Ay-ray-bica. I don't know, he just seemed crazy.
Ghetto princess #3: No, no, he was definitely Greek, cause he spoke like he was in the mafia and everything.
–A Train
Hobo: Sixty. Sixty, sixty, sixty, sixty!
Fellow passenger: Sixty?
Hobo: No.
–E Train
Lesbian: Rachel's dying her hair again, she's going back to redhead. She's so dedicated! Every time she changes her hair color she makes sure she does the whole job, just for me!
Friend: Uh, doesn't one usually do the “whole job” when dying hair?
Lesbian: No, no, I mean she dyes *down there*, you know?
Friend: Ah, right, gotcha. (pause) Uh, wasn't she lime green last month?
–F Train
Elderly black woman #1: I don't know why Barack Obama didn't pick Condoleezza Rice as his running mate.
Elderly black woman #2: Mmmmm hmmmm.
Elderly black woman #1: I mean, she's got all kindsa honorary doctorates and such.
–2 Train
Overheard by: Frankie
Church lady #1: You should try this restaurant I went to last week in Brooklyn.
Church lady #2: Oh, is that in the hood?
Church lady #1: No, it's not quite in the hood, but it's close. It's about two stops from the hood.
–A Train
Overheard by: what's happening to our hood?
Conductor at subway door yelling at guy in suit: Stop holding the subway door.
Guy in suit: Want to take off your belt and beat me?
–E Train
Overheard by: Fellow Subway Rider
Mom, entering subway in Harlem with two-year-old son: Honey, just go sit on the floor.
(son begins to sit, mom laughs) No! Don't do that! I'm just messing with you!
–A Train
Overheard by: adam h.
Woman #1: That's a nice necklace. Where did you get it?
Woman #2: Lord & Taylor.
Woman #1: I can't go there anymore since they caught me shoplifting.
–Uptown 4 Train
Tourist, before getting into purse-filled van: Aw shit, what did I just say? I said I was not getting into any strange vans today.
–Canal & Lafayette
Pseudo-knowledgeable tourist: It's so strange that they have turnstiles that go both ways, you know, ones that let you go in and out in the same turnstile. Every other subway station I've been in in New York has ones for entering and different ones for exiting.
–5th Ave E Station
Overheard by: Colleen
French tourist (with American accent) to French friends: Stand clear of the closing doors, please. (French tourists bust up laughing)
–1 Train
Overheard by: kdub
30-something female tourist heading to subway: I prefer the Sex and the City version of New York.
–Union Square
Overheard by: E-Love
Old woman tourist: Geez, you'd think they'd be a little more optimistic at the United Nations.
–United Nations
Teenage British boy tourist to the rest of his family, as they pass a souvenir shop: Oh! This must be where Tim got that "I heart New York" shirt! (whole family excitedly goes into the store)
–Fulton St
Ghetto bum to Asian: Yo man, let me get yo seat.
Asian guy (calmly): Do I look Native American to you? You can't just come and take shit from me.
Bum: Oh, sorry about that! (he asks person next to him and gets a seat)
–2 Train
Overheard by: Seizure
