Teenage girl on cell: Yo, we just got a new game, you wanna come over?
Teenage boyfriend: (mumbles)
Teenage girl on cell: All you gotta do is get high.
Teenage boyfriend: (mumbles).
Teenage girl on cell: And drunk.
–7th Ave & 50th
Overheard by: Aaron
Short girl: Yo, Friday? I'm getting done. Done! Getting saucy. Saucy! With two double Es. "Sau-cee!" Like pasta! Nigga, I get buns!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Ben B.
Office drone to coworker: So yeah, they have this like big place in the city. But they have a patio and a garden and they cook every single night. They cook on their patio! But not like my cooking. Not cereal. They make braised lamb.
–32nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: Marie Z.
Teen on cell: Mmm, that peppercorn brandy sauce was gangster.
–72nd & Colombus
Overheard by: Lauren
Random dude: Maybe they'll let you put a biscuit on lay-away.
–KFC, 106th & Broadway
Guy on cell: So, I just need to get some toilet paper, tomato soup, and chain myself in the room for a while.
–Astor Place
Overheard by: Brigdh
Eight-year-old kid to mother, referring to generic cereal: Yo, they've got bootleg Froot Loops!
–Target, Atlantic & Flatbush
Overheard by: Ravi
Blonde chick to dude: Isn't he, like, koreish?
–F Train
Dude on cell: It's not even like a relationship, it's all texting, it's a textationship.
–22nd & 1st
Overheard by: loves it
Girl on cell: She was all slippy and shit.
–SoHo
Student to another: The trouble with you is that you got the wrong misconception.
–Broadway & 116th
Overheard by: Cousin Al
Mom, upon examining young son's pruney toes: Jake! What's wrong with your toe? Look, the skin is coming off, it's like you're molding! Just like a little bird! Your foot is molding!
–Prep School Swimming Pool
Overheard by: I dream of Jean
Teen on payphone: Listen! Mah words isn't what I'm sayin!
–Fulton & Broadway
Overheard by: Mondo Man
Woman on cell: You thought he was gonna shit on you? Sit? Spit? You gonna need to step up your English game.
–Fulton Street Subway Station
Overheard by: Johnny Twisto
Hobo (screaming): Steve! Steve!
Teen guy to girl: Hold on one second. (walks back to homeless man) Hey, man! How are you?
Hobo: I'm good. How's your dad doing?
Teen guy: He's good, I'll say hi to him for you.
–90th & Madison
Overheard by: only in New York
Mother: He doesn't have any bones in his legs.
Teenage daughter: Nuh-uh! What does he do?
Mother: He goes all around the world, spreading joy to everyone.
–48th & Broadway
Overheard by: Jess
Suit to another, on smoking break: Cigarettes are out, cookies are in!
–33rd & Park Ave
Teen boy: I wanna take up smoking just to prove to people how easy it is to quit. Seriously, it's not that hard. Just don't buy a pack.
–74th & Lexington
Bum to another: And so the cops went in and found them… And you know they can't arrest them for smokin' that shit…it's part of their religion!
–23rd & Park Ave
Overheard by: Francesca
Professor: The only reason valuable reason to start smoking is if you were molested as a child or some shit like that.
–Marymount Manhattan College
Girl on phone: So my roommate was bitching at me this morning for walking around in my underwear and I was like, "Dude, you got laid last night, I got yelled at by my booty call's girlfriend. I deserve to smoke cigarettes half naked on my patio."
–Lower East Side
Overheard by: innocent bystander
High school kid: Yo, I would smoke a cigarette dipped in toothpaste!
–Chambers St
Hipster teenage girl: Yeah, trust me you'd know if you'd seen me disgruntled.
Hipster teenage boy: I haven't?
Hipster teenage girl: Nope. Well…talking online, maybe.
Hipster teenage boy: Oh, you're always disgruntled online. You always have some huge, massive crisis.
Hipster teenage girl: Oh yeah, once I was really pissed off at you. I scream a lot when I'm disgruntled.
Hipster teenage boy: At me?
Hipster teenage girl: No, just in general. At my room mostly.
(long pause)
Hipster teenage girl: I'm bored. Let's go to my house and do some lines!
–Park Slope
Black teen, with I skate NY logo shirt: Hey, hey, what's the line for?
Confused white girl: I don't get your shirt.
Black teen: (amazed silence)
Confused white girl: Ohhh, it's a skateboard!
Black teen: Haha, yeah.
Confused white girl: No, no, I thought it was a…a picture of a guy with a unibrow and no mouth?
Black teen: Hey, lemme see your eyes…you have beautiful eyes.
–Virgin Megastore
Teenage Latina to friend: So I want my next man and me to have more in common. My man, he gotta dress ghetto, you know, baggy pants, piercings, and chains, but he can't be no pimp or dirty slut. He can't be having no nasty diseases. He can't have no kids or none on the way and he can't have done no time, yet.
Friend: Gattita, I hear you. But what'cha gonna do with him?
Teenage Latina: Well, he's gonna have to like scary movies and reggaeton, Mexican food, and… (pauses to think for a moment) French fries! You know, them white people's food.
Friend: Holla.
–2 Train
Overheard by: Carrie
Pubescent teen #1: I thought the Twin Towers fell!
Pubescent teen #2: They did! Do you see them through the fence dummy?
Pubescent teen #1: From where I'm standing, they look like they're still standing, and quite firmly at that! (nudges friend) Look!
Well-endowed woman, catching them staring: Isn't there a story time or something at Barnes & Noble for you kiddies? Run along, I think they have Elmo this week!
–WTC Site
