Middle-aged white guy: … Yeah, well, Stan hurt himself.
Younger black guy: Well, he be wearin dresses and shit…
–Fulton St
Overheard by: Ruru
Middle-aged white guy: … Yeah, well, Stan hurt himself.
Younger black guy: Well, he be wearin dresses and shit…
–Fulton St
Overheard by: Ruru
Male Customer: I’ll take a tall Colombian.
Male Barista: Does he have to be cute?
–Starbucks, Park Row
Overheard by: Tickled Pink
Teacher #1: I heard on the radio that the Chinese people are the ones that make the pasta. You know, the noodles.
Teacher #2: I did the research and it is pretty cheap to go to Italy. I wanna go.
–Elevator, 55 Broad St
Overheard by: Rob M
Hot blonde: Do they kick in kick boxing?
–Upper West Side
Overheard by: haha
Tourist pointing to a church: Is that the Chrysler Building?
–E 10th & Broadway
Little boy, when train jerks to a stop: Did we just hit a deer?
–Manhattan-bound N train
Overheard by: paratactical
Teen tourist: Look, I know you guys have, like, musical theatres on Broadway and stuff, but do you guys have movie theaters?
–Canal & Broadway
Tourist pointing at S train car: This is the bus that will take us to Times Square, right?
–Platform for shuttle from Grand Central to Times Square
Overheard by: the answer is yes, but you’re not right
Young girl on phone: Hells yeah, I walked out of that class! I don’t even get why we still learn about immigration. I mean, who the fuck takes boats here anymore?
–23rd & Lex
Intern #1: This job blows.
Intern #2: Yeah, today I felt like an Enron employee… I shredded documents for like three hours.
–Broad & Stone, Financial District
Hobo #1, rubbing another’s belly: Hey, man, what ya got in there?
Hobo #2: Beer.
–Canal & Broadway
Overheard by: Stonned def
Employee: The manager made us open the doors, but we don’t have shit. Nothing is ready. [A bunch of employees are frantically putting buns on trays and trays into machines.]Drunk guy, leaning on counter: I want some McGriddles! [Slips and falls.]Employee: Look at you — you can’t even keep your shit from falling over! … If you sue us, I’m going to say you was drunk.
Drunk guy, thoughtfully: You’re right… I’m going to sue you for eight McGriddles!
–McDonald’s, Fulton & Cliff St
Guy #1: They say a lot of people who suffer from bipolar disorder are promiscuous.
Guy #2: Yeah, I know. That was my ex-girlfriend’s excuse for being a whore.
–Financial District
Chick: When Derek Jeter sees where my new bug bites are, he’s going to go ballistic.
–McDonald’s, 51st & 3rd
Overheard by: Jack
Enlightened film student to dense film student: Y’know, I can’t wait for you to wake up one day, sit straight up in bed with your eyes open wide and realize that Quentin Tarantino sucks ass!
–Borders
Old guy to wife: God, Matthew McConaughey is a fucking faggot. That guy’s been sucking cock since he was born.
–42nd & Broadway
Newspaper peddler: Read all about it! Britney Spears just died! Read all about it!
–Wall St & Broadway
11-year-old girl, leaning on subway pole: I want to jump on this pole like Tila Tequila! She can put her legs up over her head!
–E train, 50th St
Old guy with gray hair: I used to be an old guy with gray hair!
–Mott & Canal St
Overheard by: Will
80-year-old man: What is rough sex? Do I put her against the wall? I don’t know.
–10th & 3rd
Overheard by: Liz
Old lady struggling to get layers of scarves and coats off: I’m not used to having to put clothes on.
–New York Historical Society
Old lady on cell: Old people like sex! I’m 85, and I still like me some sex!
–Port Authority
Overheard by: imerikaf
75-year-old lady to hobo on bench: Oh, wow, you look so cozy!
–Central Park
Old man with cane to 20-ish girl who just nabbed the cab he hailed: Happy holidays, you dumb bitch!
–62nd & 2nd
Old white guy: Fo’ shizzle!
–Outside Nederlander Theatre
