Twit: What’s that song Richard Marx sang?
Chick: Right Here Waiting.
Twit: There’s another one.
Chick: I don’t know.
Twit: It’s going to drive me crazy until I remember. Oh wait! I know! Right Here Waiting for You!
Chick: That’s the same song.
–Winnie’s, Chinatown
Arab man: Did you dance at your wedding?
Marine: I prefer not to think back at that point in my life.
–Casa Bella, Mulberry St.
Diner: Your brown sauce; it’s some sort of, um…brown sauce?
Waiter: Yes.
Dining Man: OK, that sounds good.
–Pongsri, Chinatown
Overheard by: Joseph Schoech
Kid on cell: So I rubbed it really hard and really fast… and I made her throw up.
–Marble Hill High School
Drinker to friend, while playing flip cup: I will throw up in your pussy wagon.
–Whiskey Tavern, Chinatown
Woman: I'm really glad it wasn't the Prozac making her throw up… just her other meds.
–33rd St & Park Ave
Girl: My uterus is vomiting!
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Girl on cell, looking up: I don't know, nigga! I'm standin' in fronna some ancient castle or some shit.
–Wall St & William St
Southern guy on cell: No, seriously, there's shade on the side of the streets here! (pause) No… No, I know. (pause) I'm sitting on a bench, outside, in the shade!
–Central Park
Locationally-challenged woman on cell: I'm on the street, kinda near Blockbuster?
–Blockbuster, Broadway & 9th
Girl on cell: I'm not sure where I am, everything is Asian.
–Bakery, Chinatown
Middle-aged woman on cell: We're in Soho, and he has a three-legged dog.
–Bowery & Spring
Overheard by: Kaze
White college student to Korean friend: Dude, I thought Asian-ness was like… universal!
Korean student, irritably: I hate seeing all these sneaky chinks around.
–Chinatown
Overheard by: Someone who can tell Koreans from Chinese…
Tourist woman to husband: Is it all vegetarian?
Guy waiting in doorway: Uh… Yeah.
Tourist woman: Oh. That makes sense.
–Outside Vegeterian Dim Sum, Chinatown
Overheard by: Brok
Little boy to father, watching NYPD officers standing outside on horseback: Shit, yo! The cops is here!
–W 42nd St
Overheard by: Nikki
Loudspeaker on police car to pedestrians: We have sidewalks in New York. Try using them!
–Chinatown
NYC cop to pushy tourist: Don't touch me, I have no answers for you.
–Columbus Circle
Man to cop: When are you gonna learn that, man? People suck!
–Grand Central Station
Cop on horseback to pedestrian horse admirer: Don't get any closer to the horse, unless you want rabies.
–3rd St & Thompson
Overheard by: Heather
Guy: So I'm like, "can I get a lighter?" and she pulls out two, and one is literally a penis with the flame coming out the tip, and the other one is a guy doing one of these moves, and the guy's like a tripod. So I'm like, "can I get one in a normal color?"
–Chinatown
African American man describing Indian restaurant to friend: That'll put fire in yo' ass.
–Midtown
Man to stranger: Hey, can I borrow you lighter? I need to go melt something in the bathroom.
–Jamaica Station
Overheard by: Tim
Conductor: Once again, there is nothing on fire! We got it under control. We apologize for the smoke. Next stop is Newark airport. There is nothing on fire.
–NJ Transit
Overheard by: Where there's smoke
