Friend #1: So how is your husband?
Friend #2: For some reason I keep on sleeping with his best friend.
Friend #1: What!
Friend #2: Yeah girl…I'm leaving him. So what do you want to order from the menu?
–Restaurant Queens
Friend #1: So how is your husband?
Friend #2: For some reason I keep on sleeping with his best friend.
Friend #1: What!
Friend #2: Yeah girl…I'm leaving him. So what do you want to order from the menu?
–Restaurant Queens
Female suit #1: So, we have time before the next meeting; should we talk over lunch?
Female suit #2: Sure, you’re the food maven — you pick.
Female suit #1: Any suggestions?
Female suit #2: I don’t eat much. Just coffee and yogurt.
Female suit #1: You only eat coffee and yogurt?
Female suit #2: Yeah….Oh, sometimes i eat sushi.
Female suit #1: Oh! Let’s do sushi!
Female suit #2: Perfect! I love sushi!
–MTV buidling, Times Square
Hobo: I have not eaten anything in three days and it’s freezing out. Could you find it in your heart to help me out?
Chick: I won’t give you money, but I will go into that deli and buy you dinner.
Hobo: Thank you so much. But I’m Jewish and if you don’t mind, I would really like a kosher sandwich from Mendy’s.
Chick: Oh, forget it — here’s five bucks!
–34th & Park
Tween chick #1: So when we went to Canada, we had deer.
Tween chick #2: Really? Doesn’t it have a special name too?
Tween chick #1: Yeah. Verizon, like the phones.
–M14 bus
Overheard by: Melissa
Guy: You know, we really should do something with all that driftwood we brought back from Canada.
–West Elm furniture, DUMBO
Overheard by: Ashley
The husband scoops dog shit in a clear plastic bag, swings it around and calls out to his wife: Hey, Marla! Ya hungry? Hot fudge, fresh from the oven!
–Prince St. between Thompson & West Broadway
Woman, talking about the Italian feast in Williamsburg: And they have games and rides and food. And at the end of the week they get strong men together to carry the statue.
Tourist: The Statue of Liberty?
–Williamsburg
Overheard by: just the driver
Mother: And I got you some of those little erasers that look like potpies and sushi and stuff, apparently all the kids collect them and trade them these days.
Daughter: Mom, you are aware that I'm 23?
–Penn Station
Girl: Ah! there’s a cockroach under the table.
Guy: Where are you going?
Girl: Leaving. I’ll be outside. Just pay the tab.
Guy: Okay.
Waiter: …Hey, where’d your date go?
Guy: She saw a cockroch and bolted.
Waiter: Yeah, we get that a lot.
–Patsy’s Pizza, University Place
Overheard by: Luke
Professor: We will talk about the JDC–the American Jewish Joint Distribution Committee. And no, they were not dispensing marijuana.
–Queens College
Overheard by: ShaniP
Trashy JAP on cell: So I told her I was selling, and that bitch was like, "Katrina, for how much?" And I was like "Oh my god, mom, it doesn't matter how much the weed is going for, all that matters is the quality!"
–7th Ave, Park Slope
Overheard by: penelope
Random stranger to teens: You want to buy some weed? Just come back to my mom's house!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Rhian
College student on cell: Mom, you've got to stop smoking so much weed. I mean, fuck!
–Time Square
Random dude on street: I got it all! Liquor, alcohol, marijuana, Chips Ahoy! I got it!
–44th & Broadway
Overheard by: Lagster
Street vendor: Prada bags, Louis Vuitton bags, Gucci bags, marijuana bags… (everyone looks over at him) Hey, I gotta make money somehow.
–Times Square
Overheard by: mary jane
Middle aged woman: When you hear him say that, you just grab some cake and ice cream.
Younger woman: Why?
Middle aged woman: Because that means he just dumped you…and you'll need to gain some weight to make him feel like asshole.
–Central Park
