Girl: So I was in Sweden, right, and we were riding these bikes and I sorta fell off the seat onto the bar underneath it and when I went to the bathroom there was blood in my panties and it really hurt.
Asian chick (yelling): Ohmigod, you totally lost your virginity to a bike.
Girl: Great, now the whole train knows.
–4 Train
Short haired woman: You didn't see in the car?
Little girl: No, no! Tell me, tell me!
Short haired woman: Ask your mother.
Mother: It was like an elephant exploded diarrhea all over the seat.
Little girl: I wanna see! I wanna see!
–A Train
Hipster chick: He's not gay, he just wants everyone to think that.
Hipster chick friend: How do you know?
Hipster chick: He'll only suck cock in public.
–4th St & 2nd Ave
Girl #1, checking out a dude in a restaurant: He's super hot, but I think he's gay.
Girl #2: Oh yeah, totally, look at the way he crosses his legs. And he's using chopsticks.
Girl #1: It's an Asian restaurant.
–Union Square
Overheard by: littleD
Middle school girl on Nextel: Hi mom.
Mom (from Nextel): Hello?
Girl (into Nextel): Yeah, mom. Hello? I am on my way home.
Mom (from Nextel): Where are you?
Girl (into Nextel): I am just getting off the bus right now.
–Target, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Lynda
Hoochie with kids on cell: They gave me four pills for when my period comes on… (looks at cashier) Um… They said it's gonna flood.
Cashier cutie: Looks like the flood gates already opened.
–CVS Pharmacy
Overheard by: Heater
Girl #1: A hot, sweaty penis is the best feeling.
Girl #2: I know what you mean!
–Starbucks, 78th & Lexington
Homeless man, watching cute little mouse: That mouse is aggressive! It'll attack you if provoked.
–Central Park
Concerned Long Island tween, pointing at a rat in the tracks: Oh my god, how did a squirrel get in here? Seriously, we should help it.
–W 4th St Station
Father to daughters, with head cocked up listening to dark void in the platform: Hear that, girls? The rats are playing.
–96th & Broadway Subway Platform
Overheard by: sueinthecity
Random blond chick: I don't wanna be the fricking mouse.
–Asian Restaurant, Chinatown
Dude: I was raised with rodents.
–Hunter College
Eight-year-old Italian kid to another: Hey, you know that bracelet you got at the feast? The next day I saw a mouse with it around his neck, swear to god!
–Lorimer & Maujer, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Natalya Petrovna
Haggard-looking middle-aged woman: Hi, yes, I need a refill. I need my Xanax. (short pause) My life is hell.
–CVS Pharmacy, 42nd & 10th Ave
Suit on cell: No mom, I'm not going to just start popping antidepressants without seeing a professional first! Why would you even say that?!
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: I'd have prescribed some ritalin for him
MTA conductor over loudspeaker: Hey Bobby! Lay off the steroids, they're making your voice sound funny!
–MTA Harlem Line Train
Overheard by: Nina
Loud suit on cell: Hello? Yes, hi, I'd like to order a Viagra pill. Only one, sir. No, no, just one. Sir, I want only one pill of Viagra, can you do that for me? Can I pick it up tomorrow? Great, thank you. I look forward to seeing you. Take care now, bye bye.
–44th St & 3rd Ave
20-something girl: Whenever I have a bad day, I think "How did Hillary Clinton feel?" and then I don't feel so bad. I mean they must have put her on sedatives to make it through that.
–C Train
Cute girl on cell: Well, tell her if she takes all those pills I'm going to kill her!
–Columbia University
Overheard by: arctinus
Teenybopper: I was going to see Legally Blonde, but then I threw up in Kmart twice.
–Delacourte Theater, before Hair
Overheard by: Morgan
Girl to another: It's easy–you just put your finger down your throat and you vomit!
–Union Square Park
Overheard by: Sarah
Guy on laptop to woman sitting next to him: Sorry if I make throw-up noises, no offense.
–Penn Station, NJ Transit
Overheard by: altaatlantic
Girl on cell: Oh my god. Like if that meal wasn't so expensive, I would have thrown it up!
–3rd Ave & 8th St
Overheard by: rachel
Teenage girl on payphone: Ma? Hey ma? Hold on. (vomits) I'm throwing up! (vomits some more) I *said* I'm (vomits a third time) throwing up. I'm done now. What?
–Wilson Ave, Bushwick
Overheard by: Sarah Booz
Girl to friend, while smoking: So there I was, puking…and they started to have sex!
–Third and Long Bar
