Girl #1: So is he a pharmacist or a drug dealer?
Girl #2: What’s the difference?
–5 train
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
Girl #1: So is he a pharmacist or a drug dealer?
Girl #2: What’s the difference?
–5 train
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
Woman: The world revolves around me!
Man: Who says?
Woman: Astrology. I'm a Leo. The stars say the world revolved around me.
Man: Them stars be lyin'.
–Uptown 2 Train
Overheard by: Collegiate Cutie
Drunk 20-ish chick to friends: I’m starving! I should cook something when I get home.
Thug: Don’t lie! You gonna go home, check yo’ MySpace and pass out!
–Astoria-bound N train
Overheard by: He has a point
Dude #1: How's your sister doing?
Dude #2: She's fine.
Dude #1: So what is it with all these lesbians looking like Justin Bieber?
–2 Train
Overheard by: DG
Girl: Did you hear about that guy who died from fucking horses?
Guy: No…
Girl: Yeah, I guess he made it to the hospital but he had been like, split apart by horse cock.
–C train
Overheard by: Ilona Williamson
Train conductor: Mr Raymond Johnson, if you're looking for your wife, she's in car #6604.
Random guy: With me!
–2 Train
Construction worker with Long Island accent: Man, I finally found Waldo the other day.
Construction worker #2: Yeah?
Construction worker with Long Island accent: Tall, striped shirt, weird shoes. And I was like, “there's Waldo!”
–2 Train
Overheard by: Waldo's alter-ego
Ghetto chick: She went by and shoved me and was like “Ex-cuse me!”, but not like “excuse me”, you know? So she had this long hair? Well, I grabbed her by the hair, flung her down the stairs, and started kicking her ass. I’ll fight anybody.
–D train
Girl to friend: So I got my horse, things got a little escalated… He got his horse…
–The Cloisters
Overheard by: ninja z
Small child on bike: Suck my butt monkey!
–Central Park
Metrosexual on cell: I can only hope the animal noises are promising for my night.
–Stuyvesant Town
Overheard by: Argopelter
African man to African woman: I told you when you came to this country that you can’t touch old people, you can’t touch children, and you can’t touch animals.
–Central Park, near W 63rd St entrance
Overheard by: birdw0rks
Woman to another: He would go one way and the armadillo would go the other way…
–42nd St, outside Bryant Park
Overheard by: MPW
Sad girl to friend: I’d feel better if I just had lemurs to talk to.
–Washington Square Park
Mom: So, what kind of animals do you think we will see at the zoo?
Small boy: I think elephants and snakes… Mom? Are there also pretend things there, like dinosaurs and God?
Mom: I think we need to have a talk when we get home.
–N train near Union Square
