Wednesday Isn't One-Liner. He Has a Girlfriend in Canada.

11 year-old girl to dad: Sucking on something automatically makes you gay.

–High Line

Overheard by: Kirby

NYPD detective, working Gay Pride parade: They've been coming out for the last two hours. And they will probably be coming out for another three hours!

–5th Ave & 55th St

Overheard by: Just Visiting…

Not very effeminate gay guy, near extremely effeminate group of pride festers: Suddenly, I don't feel so gay!

–PrideFest, Abingdon Square

Overheard by: proud dad

Man to friend: The problem with getting too buff is that people start to think that you're gay.

–Starbucks

Male fashionista to stranger on bus: And she thought I was gay because I dress well and stuff. (to another passenger) Oh, is that moisturizer? Can I use some?

–Hampton Jitney

Overheard by: Can't imagine why she thought so

Woman handcuffed to man, having romantic picnic with rose petals spilled over a blanket: I didn't think I would be handcuffed to you in a park telling you all of my secrets when I met you in a gay bar!

–Central Park Sheep Meadow

Posted on September 30, 2009
All Wednesday One-Liners, BJs, Bus, Central Park, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Clothing, Compare/Contrast, Cops, Dads, Fashionistas, Fitness, Friends, Gays and Lesbians, Health and Hygiene, Kids, Men, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Offers and requests, On the Bus, One-liners, Parades & Festitivites, Parents, Parks, Passengers, Physical appearance, Queer guys, Questions, S&M, Starbucks, Strangers, Street, The Village, Time, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Women

Give Me a Wednesday With One-Liners, Long Beautiful One-Liners

Latino nanny to redheaded toddler, after he throws his hat at her: Put your hat back on your hair! It's freaking people out.

–Central Park

Disheveled raggedy hobo, reprimanding suit: Get a haircut!

–Wachovia Wells Fargo

Overheard by: CS

Loud black girl on cell phone: You know where the train station is, where all them homeless people live? Yeah, that's where I go get my hair done. She doesn't fuck my hair up, because I told her, "you best not fuck my hair up." And now she never does. (chuckles)

–LIRR

Overheard by: kill her

Beautiful angry woman on cell: I had told you to meet me at 116th Street because I got my hair in my bag! My weave hair! I had wanted to do my hair later, because it's too damn hot to be sitting up in that place. But I'm not going to no damn barbecue with weave hair in my bag!

–The Bronx

Overheard by: Shrimp on the barbie

Little boy with squirt gun: No! You wetted my hair! My beautiful flowing hair!

–Rockefeller Park

Posted on September 30, 2009
All Wednesday One-Liners, Anger Management, Bank, Beauty, Black People, Central Park, Clothing, Food, Girls, Hair, Heat, Hobos, Homeless, Kids, Latinos, Laughter, On Cell, One-liners, Parks, Physical appearance, Suits, The Bronx, Threats, Trains Not Subway, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Weapons, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Wishes & desires, Women

A Jersey Boy and an LA Girl, But It Was New York That Brought Them Together

Guido in Mercedes, honking horn: Yo!
(jogging hottie ignores him)
Guido: Can I talk to you?
(jogging hottie ignores him)
Guido: What's wrong with me, no date?
(jogging hottie ignores him)
Guido: Is it my hair, my clothes?
Jogging hottie, taking off headphones: I don't date Mercedes C230s.

–West Side Highway Jogging Path

Overheard by: La Diabla

Posted on September 28, 2009
Bimbettes, Cars and Driving, Clothing, Dating, Guidos, Hair, Physical appearance, Questions, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

Actually, Something Like This

Unattractive fag hag: So we went out Friday and he slept over afterwards.
Gay male friend: I knew it!
Unattractive fag hag: Yeah, but then like, the next morning, I was in the other room and I overheard him talking on his cell phone and he was saying something about how I was a brown bagger. What does that mean, that it was in the bag? Like, I'm a slut?
Gay male friend: Uhhhh… something like that.

–L Train

Posted on September 27, 2009
Beauty, Fag Hags, Friends, Hook Ups, On the Subway, Physical appearance, Promiscuity, Queer guys, Questions, Words

Yo Soy Wednesday-One-Liner!

Hobo with guitar, singing: My girl! That white girl is my girl! She may look like Brooke Shields but she's my girl! My girl! Oooh-ooh… Come on, everybody, sing with me, Puerto Ricans, too!

–1 Train

Overheard by: Tater

Drunk Puerto Rican father to man on train, yelling: The capital of Puerto Rico is the Bronx, bitch!

–6 Train

Overheard by: Alice Dalice

Guy, about some girls: I tried to tell them I was Puerto Rican, but they kept saying I was from Spain and called me a douchebag.

–East Village

Overheard by: NYCGlamDiva

Diner waitress: Just because he's Puerto Rican don't mean he's a cheetah.

–Park Slope

Overheard by: monkey girl

Asian girl to Hispanic guy: Come on! She's, like, the Puerto Rico of Asia!

–Jamba Juice, Mercer & Houston

Posted on September 16, 2009
About Celebrities, Animals & Nature, Asians, Baristas, Compare/Contrast, Dads, Drunks, Foreigners, Girls, Global Geography, Guys, Hobos, Insults, Latinos, Musicians, On the Subway, One-liners, Park Slope, Passengers, Physical appearance, Puerto Ricans, Restaurants & Cafes, Singing, Soho, Stupidity, U.S. Geography, Union Square and East Village, Wednesday One-Liners

The Little Black Wednesday One-Liner

Professor: I don't know why any of us are here… It's gorgeous out and there are very lovely ladies wearing minimal clothing!

–NYU

Overheard by: Ginger

College girl in short skirt to friend: My ass feels naked and exposed, that's how I feel.

–Grand Central

Overheard by: Ilysse Weisenfeld

Man to woman: She's really starting to perfect the "slutty flight attendant" look.

–Penn Station

Overheard by: Glory

Woman, with pride: My gynecologist wears leather mini skirts and platform shoes!

–Park Slope

Female suit: I am the worst lawyer ever. That's why I dress like a slut. I always win.

–L Train

Posted on September 16, 2009
All Wednesday One-Liners, Ass, Beauty, Clothing, Compare/Contrast, Friends, Grand Central, Medicine, Men, Nicknames & name calling, Nudity, NYU, On the Subway, One-liners, Park Slope, Penn Station, Physical appearance, Shoes, Sorority Girls, Suits, Teachers/Professors, Train Station, Weather, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Women

And Hungry

Hipster boy: Are you a vegetarian?
Hipster girl: No.
Hipster boy: You look like you could be, and I mean that as a compliment. It means you look hip.

–Grand Sichuan, St. Mark's Place

Overheard by: aryn

Posted on September 14, 2009
Compliments, Hipsters, Physical appearance, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Union Square and East Village, Vegetarian & Vegan

They Rep for Elite

Hobo #1: Girl, you a model?
Hobo #2: Nah. She too short to be a model.

–51st St & Madison Ave

Overheard by: flattered

Posted on September 11, 2009
Girls, Height, Hobos, Homeless, Jobs & Careers, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Physical appearance, Questions

Maybe It's Time to Stop Reading Courtenay Love's Parenting Guides.

Son to mother sitting at diner: Mom, why am I so small? Am I going to grow?
Mother: Yes, honey, of course you will. You're perfect just the way you are.
(son starts blowing bubbles in his soda and asks mother to start blowing bubbles in his soda too. She starts, then looks around at some people staring at them)
Mother: You know, I just realized how gross this is.

–Diner, 53rd & 1st

Posted on September 11, 2009
Drinks, Height, Kids, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Moms, Parents, Physical appearance, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Weirdness

Physical appearance