Drunk man #1: Oh my god, Lily Tomlin, man?
Drunk man #2: Yeah?
Drunk man #1: Yeah, really! Nine to Five? Awesome.
Drunk man #2: I didn't know.
Drunk man #1: Yeah, dude! She was in Blue Hawaii with Elvis.
Drunk man #2: I had no idea.
Drunk man #1: I wish I met her, man. She died right after she married Lou Reed.
–Grand Central Station
Woman on cell, sitting at counter: The baby's not out yet…as in "it's still inside her."
–McDonald's, Varick Street
Overheard by: Jordan
College student: It's like taking candy from a baby…only, ya know, I'd ask the mother first.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Dara
Dork walking by Babies "R" Us with friends: Dude, look! I totally wanna buy a baby!
–Union Square South
Guy on cell: That shop smells like babies!
–Union Square
Drunk man in Santa hat to all train passengers: I know all you ladies want to have babies for Christmas, but there's no time for it! Close your legs, there'll be less heads.
–L Train
Overheard by: Handley Elizabeth
Black lady to family in obama t-shirts: You know how all those irish people have pictures of kennedy hanging up in their living rooms? Now we can do that too!
–Whole Foods, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Definitely has a JFK picture in her apartment
Guy selling obama-themed condoms: Remember the election with every erection!
–Times Square
Overheard by: Mary Button
Black woman with a child in her stroller braiding her hair: There's gona be a lot of braidin in the white house.
–1 Train
Overheard by: Subway surfer
Woman on cell phone: Girl, if I can get to the front of the line at the vma's I can get to the front of the line at the damn inauguration. Shiiiit it's barack obama, girl!
–manhattan dental waiting room
Overheard by: Catherine
Stoned kid to a group of his friends discussing politics: You know what's scary bro? If obama gets assassinated, george bush is gonna be president again.
–1 Train @ 2AM going Downtown
Black man handing out metro: "get your obama metro! Get your obama metro! See, anyone can be president… I'm next!"
–59th Street, Lexington Ave
Overheard by: Yes we can!
14-year-old boy #1: You ever play any Chopin?
14-year-old boy #2: Yeah, I played one of his last year.
14-year-old boy #1: Can you play Fantasie-Impromptu? That one's mad hard.
14-year-old boy #2: No, I did an Etude. That's where you play scales and shit.
14-year-old boy #1: I read that he, like, bridged the gap between the classical and romantic eras.
14-year-old boy #2: No way, dude. You ever hear his Nocturnes? That shit is mad romantic. You're thinking of Beethoven.
14-year-old boy #1: Oh, right. Beethoven. He was a pimp.
–2 Train
Overheard by: Blerg
White hobo, descending from second floor: Hey! (entire restaurant freezes) Yo, fellas–stay black.
(complete silence)
Black guy: Yo, man–stay white.
–Burger King, Herald Square
Woman #1: It's so weird that I keep running into her!
Woman #2: I know! Especially since she lives in Dallas.
–Uptown 6 Train
Overheard by: eavesdropper
(lady #2 hurriedly puts up umbrella when coming out of the station)
Lady #1: It's not raining–at all.
Lady #2: I don't care!
–22nd & 5th
20-something woman on cell: I fuck you, I get dinner. He fucks you, he gets a house!
–Washington Square
Girl: Earthquakes come every ten years, and it's not that bad. It's not like your house goes down or something.
–Flushing, Queens
Overheard by: mia
Excited kindergartner: We played house and then we played going to the co-op!
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Elderly man to another: People are gonna kill people, they just need to do it in their own house.
–Austin St & 77th Ave
20-something: So yeah, we used to hang out in elementary school. He'd come over my house, kinda like a "whose cock is bigger?" kinda thing.
–Brooklyn
Overheard by: AnnaBanana
