An Asian woman is talking loudly on her cell phone
Fat Black lady: You need to move to the back of the damn bus. We don’t wanna hear that ching-chang ching-chong bullshit!
–Q34 bus
Overheard by: Lauren
An Asian woman is talking loudly on her cell phone
Fat Black lady: You need to move to the back of the damn bus. We don’t wanna hear that ching-chang ching-chong bullshit!
–Q34 bus
Overheard by: Lauren
Guy on cell: Hello?…What do you mean you have bad news?…You’re pregnant? How could you be pregnant?…I thought you were on the Pill? How did this happen?!…I just got engaged to your sister on the 4th of July…This is really bad news…How long have you known?…A week?! Why did you wait a week to tell me?…Your sister is going to go through the roof…No, she doesn’t come back until Monday…So, I’ll see you tonight?…I told you, I just got engaged to your sister. You can’t be pregnant…Okay, have a good afternoon.
He makes another call.
Guy on cell: Hey…You know Claire*?…Yeah, Lauren’s* sister…Yeah, the hot one…Well, she’s pregnant…Me!
–46th between 5th & 6th
Dude on cell: She was a size 16 before the baby, but now she’s a 32. She went from Kermit the Frog to Snuffleupagus!…What size are you?
–Staten Island Ferry
Teenage blonde girl to another: You know what pisses me off? You can't look American.
Friend: Umm, yeah you can.
Teenage blonde girl: No, because you would have to look Indian, but all the Indians are dead. Christopher Columbus killed them all. I'm still really mad about that.
–G Train
Megaphone lady: Don’t buy from Canada! Don’t go to Canada! Don’t support Canada at all!…Don’t buy Canadian beer!
–49th & 6th
Teen scene girl: And that's a whole fucking different story! You always said you wanted to die having a heart attack in a car!
–57th & 3rd
Overheard by: Duluthian
Guy in line: I haven't had a corn dog since Jim Belushi died.
–Nathan's, Coney Island
Creepy guy on cell: Hey. Did you hear about the Craigslist killer? Yeah, isn't that a great idea?
–Penn Station
20-something irritated man on cell: Dude, stop freaking out! They're probably not going to do the autopsy for another three days.
–8th Ave & 15th St
Conductor: Please, no one cross cars, if the train makes a turn you will fall through, get crushed and die, thank you and have a lovely evening. Oh, and it's lovely to be alive.
–Amtrak Train to Penn Station
Overheard by: Paige
Hobo: I wanna tackle you! I’m gonna tackle you girl! I’m gonna tackle you girl! You hear me? I’m gonna tackle you!
Girl #1: Did he just say he wants to tackle us?
Girl #2: Oh my god! What did he mean by that?
–Spring & Mercer
Overheard by: Spooner
A hobo on crutches hobbles towards a chick walking in the opposite direction, and she swerves to avoid him.
Crutchbo: You think you can outsmart me, bitch? Next time I’ll cut you.
Woman: I’m hoping there won’t be a next time.
–Port Authority
Bus driver: Take it to the end of the bus.
Dude: What?
Bus driver: Take it to the end of the bus. I don’t want to listen to you cursing.
Dude: What the fuck? I am not talking to you.
Bus driver: I don’t talk like that.
Dude: You look like you talk like that!
–Q23 bus
Hobo: You have a quarter for a cup of coffee?
Suit: Excuse me, can’t you see I’m on the phone?
Hobo: I don’t have time for games!
–42nd & 7th
