Thug #1: Nigga, you all old-like 'n shit. You be like, sixteen goin' on sixty.
Thug #2: Me?! Nigga, you got that shit all backwards. Look at Jerome. He be sixteen goin' on dead.
–Fulton & Nassau
Thug #1: Nigga, you all old-like 'n shit. You be like, sixteen goin' on sixty.
Thug #2: Me?! Nigga, you got that shit all backwards. Look at Jerome. He be sixteen goin' on dead.
–Fulton & Nassau
Man: What the fuck are you doing in here?
Woman: I'm sorry, I just had to pee.
Man: Holy shit! I can't fucking believe it. The first time I see my ex-wife in forty years is in a men's bathroom.
–Picnic House Men's Room, Prospect Park
Middle school girl on Nextel: Hi mom.
Mom (from Nextel): Hello?
Girl (into Nextel): Yeah, mom. Hello? I am on my way home.
Mom (from Nextel): Where are you?
Girl (into Nextel): I am just getting off the bus right now.
–Target, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Lynda
Woman: So my friend was going to vote for Obama, but now, since her boyfriend is from, like, Alaska, she's going to vote for McCain instead.
–Store, 2nd Ave
Woman to friend: Joe says he weighs 145 but he's a Republican. You can't trust anything he says.
–Pinetree Lodge, 35th & 1st
Hobo on street corner: Vote for McCain. Get nuclear rockets shot up your ass and eat moose burgers all day!
–W 3rd & MacDougal St
Overheard by: Matt
60-something woman dressed like teenybopper, talking about Sarah Palin on cell: She proves you can be pretty and smart. She's more than a bulldog in a pantsuit; she's like Alaska Barbie!
–Penn Station
Yuppie dad to whiny daughter: Barack Obama doesn't like it when his daughters whine.
–Caroll Gardens
Middle-aged, white man on cell: Do not call me at this number again. Never call me at this number again. Listen, if you call me at this number again I will, in fact, vote for John McCain.
–Tea Lounge, Cobble Hill
Teenybopper: I was going to see Legally Blonde, but then I threw up in Kmart twice.
–Delacourte Theater, before Hair
Overheard by: Morgan
Girl to another: It's easy–you just put your finger down your throat and you vomit!
–Union Square Park
Overheard by: Sarah
Guy on laptop to woman sitting next to him: Sorry if I make throw-up noises, no offense.
–Penn Station, NJ Transit
Overheard by: altaatlantic
Girl on cell: Oh my god. Like if that meal wasn't so expensive, I would have thrown it up!
–3rd Ave & 8th St
Overheard by: rachel
Teenage girl on payphone: Ma? Hey ma? Hold on. (vomits) I'm throwing up! (vomits some more) I *said* I'm (vomits a third time) throwing up. I'm done now. What?
–Wilson Ave, Bushwick
Overheard by: Sarah Booz
Girl to friend, while smoking: So there I was, puking…and they started to have sex!
–Third and Long Bar
Girl #1: I didn't know he had a girlfriend.
Girl #2: I did…but I was drunk so I blocked it out.
Girl #1: Horrible mistake.
Girl #2: Yeah, I regret it.
Girl #1: Good fuck, though. Big dick.
Girl #2: And that's all that matters.
–Brooklyn Heights
Cranky old guy: I used to get so goddamn pissed at that old rat bastard Frankie. Sometimes I wanted to snuff him out. He was a good dude, though, y'know?
Old buddies #1 and #2: Word!
–Bergen St, Brooklyn
Brooklyn girl #1: He was more Italian than regular DJs?
Brooklyn girl #2: He was European Italian.
–Bay Ridge
Overheard by: not italian or a dj
Five-year-old girl: Mommy! Taking the train is fun! It's like going to the zoo! (points to several rats on the tracks)
Mother: Yes darling, just remember it's not a petting zoo! (frantically pulls her daughter away from the platform).
–Pacific St N Line
Drunk and disorderly woman: Joshua! What the fuck?! (gives him a clumsy punch) Oh my god! This shit's not gonna come off!
Sober male companion: I don't know what you're flipping out about. You would've just licked it off your arm anyway.
–Ave U & W 7th St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Kris S.
