Man, loudly: It's been a long time since I fucked a racehorse.
Man's friend, reassuringly, to surprised bystanders: He's Irish.
–36th St & Madison
Overheard by: Bystanding Citizen
Man, loudly: It's been a long time since I fucked a racehorse.
Man's friend, reassuringly, to surprised bystanders: He's Irish.
–36th St & Madison
Overheard by: Bystanding Citizen
Guy outside NY Life building: You have to entrance a man with your pussy… or your voice.
–26th & Madison Ave
Overheard by: Seeking Dating Advice
Ghetto guy to date: I eat pussy for 40 minutes!
–The Frying Pan
Overheard by: Aly
Irate woman on cell: I ain't a size two anymore! This shit be hurtin my ass, and my vah-jay-jay!
–6th Ave & 38th St
Girl to another: If you were a stranger, I'd punch you in the vagina.
–D Train
Father to teenage son: There will be plenty more pussy to come, you just need to get your swagger back.
–Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Mister Pants
Sikh #1: And then I broke my sacrum.
Sikh #2: What's a sacrum?
Sikh #1: My butt bone.
–23rd St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: E.S.
Woman: That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me!
Man: I take it back.
–26th St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Extremely aggressive man, shouting and pointing at woman on cell: Do not! Ever! Refer to me as from fucking Baltimore! I fucking hate Baltimore!
–2nd Ave & 4th St
Female student, anxiously, to male friend: I don't know who they are, but I'm pretty sure I don't like 'em!
–Fordham University
Overheard by: eternal student
Flyer guy: Would you like to see a comedy..? Oh, it's you again! Why do you hate me?
–Times Square
Overheard by: Sara
Hobo to passers-by: Join the He-Man woman haters club! Free membership!
–Park Ave & 31st St
Little boy, pointing with disgust at picture of Jay Leno on hot drink sleeve: Is this George Washington? I hate him!
–Hot'n'Crusty, Upper West Side
Group of friends, singing: Tell me more! Tell me more!
Soloist: Did she poop on your face?
–19th St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Lotte
Serious guy to another: See these hands? These are my bread and butter!
–Brooklyn Bridge
Overheard by: Hi-D
Well-dressed 25-year-old on phone: Yes. (pause) Please spare me the placenta. (pause) Okay, well, as long as it's clean.
–Key Foods
Woman on cell: So, she doesn't think her body is going to be ready by then?
–32nd & Park Ave
Overheard by: Publius
Man on cell: I wish I could just take my legs off. That would be so much easier.
–45th St & Ave of the Americas
Loud chick: Yeah, I'm still taking French classes. Last week we did commands, and this week we're learning, like, body parts.
–Hudson St
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
20-something girl on cell: But I have several heads…
–Metro-North Rail
Three-year-old boy to punk girl in black fishnets, as he pokes though holes: Um… why is your legs trapped?
–Thompkins Square Park
Indian woman: You can't say “Paki”! You just can't!
Italian man: What about “Paki-bashing”?
Indian woman: Absolutely not! And you certainly can't say it in a fake Indian accent! You know, you need to take a sensitivity course. Just for you.
Irish man: Yeah, you wop!
–28th St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Father to son: Son, I love you, fuckface!
Son to father: I love you too.
–37th & 4th
Overheard by: Jonas Puer
Teeny tiny gay guy: I used to be so skinny in high school.
–Staten Island
Teenage girl to another: I mean, why bother to eat anything if you're just gonna shit it all out?
–L Train
Woman carrying baby to friend: Also, I burn an extra 500 calories a day just by breastfeeding!
–5th Ave & 16th St
Overheard by: Tracy
20-something guy, about Sour Patch Kids gummy candy: They're fat-free, so they're good for you!
–4 Train
Six-year-old girl, eating bagel: All of the fat from this is going to go straight to my ass!
–A Train
Overheard by: that's just great
